By neonstarr - 30/10/2013 10:41 - New Zealand

Today, I could think of more 'pros' than 'cons' for why I should start drinking again. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 202
You deserved it 7 145

neonstarr tells us more.

neonstarr 15

Op here. Surprised this got posted. Sorry to burst some the bubbles but I'm not an alcoholic, I stopped drinking because of medical reasons, turns out I have gluten intolerance which caused damage to my gut, and by association killed my stomach lining and throat. Wasn't pleasant. Also I'm a chick. And since I'm better, I was weighing out pros and cons at 330am. If I ever do have a drinking problem Ill use some of the advice :)

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Top comments

Rainhawk94 27

Did you take a shot for every pro?

231 12
Nyx_fml 23

There may be more pros, but maybe the cons outweigh the pros?

186 9

Comments

Voij 16

When making a list of pros and cons, always make sure to also include values to indicate how strong certain points weigh in each side's favor. This can help determine whether you were favoring one side or another, which can show you what decision your subconscious has made. (You could also throw a coin, then judge by whether you'd like to change it to "Best two out of three" or not.)

16 4
perdix 29

Plus, you have a lot of friends instantly! Jack Daniels, Johnnie Walker, Jose Cuervo, Captain Morgan and Samuel Adams are all waiting for you at the bar! Cheers! (Where everybody knows your name.)

43 13
Enslaved 36

Can we also invite Stella, Brandy, Sherry and Margarita so that this party's not a sausage fest? :P

24 1
perdix 29

#48, except for Miss Artois, I didn't know any of their last names and wouldn't know where to find them. I couldn't think of a single drink that was a woman's full name. I mean Harvey Wallbanger and Tom Collins just make it worse.

15 1
Meettitan 14

Shirley Temple? I guess she might be a bit young for this party...

18 1
perdix 29

#61, and she's non-alcoholic -- a real turn-off to the serious drinking man.

10 3
Chumsword 8

Poor Jim Bean was left outside.... not invited to the party.

5 1
dzhunt 6

Hey #81 you can make Shirley dirty though ;-)

1 4
thestrangedude 10

There was a reason that things got bad enough for you to give up. Try to remember that reason and hang in there you can get through this and will feel so much better for having beat your demons.

8 5
sunnyray812 42

Even though there may be more pros, think about your health and how drinking would destroy it. It's not worth it.

7 5
crzysweetksss 1

You and me both.

2 4
papayeya 18

Drinks is just a temp escape... it is not a solution.. .. i know life can be hard... and for long soemtimes... well it is u whom u will be to change it... Ask for help and let others help u.. mayne someown u trust and mature... this what i do .. i ask help and list my problems and let others help to solve it or at least to show me a way to.. all the best :)

8 11
vipirius 18

No it's not, and that jokes wasn't funny the first 2838742 times either.

4 12
MortenM 17

It's only a temporary solution if you go sober again

1 6
horneyhic 15

It's is a solution to social awkwardness

3 3
perdix 29

If you've got pros that outweigh "brain damage," "cirrhosis," and "waking up next to ugly naked chicks," I need you to show me how to party!

25 3
Epikouros 31

You don't understand, perdix. Waking up next to naked ugly chicks is the pro that outweighs all cons. Ugly chicks are like the no. 2 car rental service: they try harder to please you.

5 2
katejones 8

The one reason of 'it will kill me' should outweigh all the others. Go to AA, good luck.

7 3
j_729 18

If you're responsible with it, it won't kill you.

3 1
love_me_electric 20

The main reason someone becomes an alcoholic is because they don't know HOW to be responsible with it. Good luck telling an alcoholic to stop at 5 drinks.

4 0