FML : Today, due to a hammer-related incident, instead of receiving glass ornaments as gifts from my trip to Venice, my friends will be receiving novelty postcards...

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Today, due to a hammer-related incident, instead of receiving glass ornaments as gifts from my trip to Venice, my friends will be receiving novelty postcards of Michelangelo's David's penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

Stop_HammerTime Say more :

The truth is actually much dumber than some of you are giving me credit for, and definitely warrants a YDI. I'd bought a few small glass things for my friends from Venice. They were all packaged so they made it off the plane fine. When I got home I put them down and started nailing up posters that I'd got in the museums on my visit. I put the hammer down on a pile of boxes while I went to get more nails, which was dumb, and it fell off onto the ornaments. The novelty postcards were all I had left.

By Stop_HammerTime - / Monday 4 August 2014 13:51 / United Kingdom - Northwich

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Top comments

By alaen23 | 23

#6027674 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:18

I really want to know the story behind this.

By NicH1799 | 20

#6027695 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:33

I'll play it out for you guys. OP is at home, chilling. Suddenly, wall caves in. Don't ask how, that's disrespectful. Never disrespect a man whose walls have caved in. Anyways, he calls his handyman friend. He comes over to fix that shit, says for free. Little did OP know, free fixes are an invitation for a hammer party. Long story short, all his friends are invited to bring hammers, run around house swinging them. One hits OP's fine china cabinet, one hits his nuts. That's my highly scientific theory, anyway.

Comments

By alaen23 | 23

#6027674 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:18

I really want to know the story behind this.

btrag97 | 13

#6027678 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:20

So do I lol

NicH1799 | 20

#6027695 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:33

sweetest_jenn | 18

#6027704 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:43

#14 lay off the drugs. It's bad for you, son.

baseballbv | 17

#6027722 - Monday 4 August 2014 19:19

Well that's a hard situation to chisel yourself out of.

LanceGoodthrust | 19

#6027744 - Monday 4 August 2014 19:49

I'm guessing it was customs, assuming there were drugs inside

Brandi_Faith | 33

#6027760 - Monday 4 August 2014 20:01

Follow up definitely needed, although after 14's awesome play-by-play I don't think the real story would be nearly as satisfying.

Mystery_Unsolved | 16

#6027820 - Monday 4 August 2014 21:25

They need favorite buttons for comments

orbit | 22

#6027871 - Monday 4 August 2014 23:18

Luckily, #19, he has a hammer to help

NicH1799 | 20

#6027999 - Tuesday 5 August 2014 3:33

#42, you the real mvp

LeashaJoy5595 | 28

#6028001 - Tuesday 5 August 2014 3:34

Creative! But OP is a girl...

1two3four5six | 23

#6028260 - Tuesday 5 August 2014 11:15

Is is weird that I read #14's comment in the voice of Jules from Pulp Fiction?

By Garrison21 | 11

#6027676 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:19

Well that sucks

By DoctorsDaughter | 11

#6027677 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:20

What happened? Why are the postcards being sent?

soulreaper12296 | 28

#6027772 - Monday 4 August 2014 20:10

Did you read the first sentence of the FML? If you did you would know something happened that involved a hammer and the smashing of ornaments.

Daylightscar | 13

#6027963 - Tuesday 5 August 2014 2:47

Umm no where in the first line did it say the ornaments were smashed, just that a hammer related incident occurred

Daylightscar | 13

#6027967 - Tuesday 5 August 2014 2:55

Also this FML is only one sentence, so idk why you said "did you read the first sentence of the FML" implying that there is more than one sentence

By gracehi | 31

#6027679 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:20

"Hammer related incident?"

Those damn rogue hammers smashing things on their accord.

AxNxNxIxEx12 | 7

#6027973 - Tuesday 5 August 2014 3:04

I thought it said hamster at first

By ELoni_fml | 25

#6027681 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:21

How do you accidentally smash your ornaments with a hammer?

By CaiDog | 20

#6027683 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:22

I don't understand why even in this situation, you'd send novelty postcards of Michelangelo's David's penis

LisaDay | 14

#6027917 - Tuesday 5 August 2014 0:36

im assuming OP spent quite a bit of money on the ornaments and doesnt have enough money left to replace them, but does have enough for postcards.

Nymeria_fml | 25

#6027924 - Tuesday 5 August 2014 0:44

I would think it's more because OP bought the ornaments in Italy, and she's in the UK now. Sooooo... maybe the only thing left from her trip are the postcards.

By annie_nk | 22

#6027684 - Monday 4 August 2014 18:23

Was Captain Hammer the culprit?

Brandi_Faith | 33

#6027753 - Monday 4 August 2014 19:56

No, it was M C Hammer.

buckdharma | 35

#6027819 - Monday 4 August 2014 21:19

28- Op met M.C in Venice and asked him back to her place for some wine, and wound up getting hammered. A drunken op thought she heard,"can you touch this?" Thinking this was an amorous advance she touched that, resulting in everything in her room getting busted instead of more funky lyrics. He then made a quick escape, inadvertently forgetting his penis postcards which he had already signed,"Can't Touch This," which he had found out by spending"Hammer Time" in a Venice jail.