By Few_Absolutes - United States
Today, at work, my stomach hurt and I passed gas for relief. Moments later, I discovered that my loose, silent "fart" was actually a wet, sneaky shart. The mess was beyond repair; I had to fake a family emergency and crept out of the office so that my coworkers wouldn't see my obvious crap stain. FML
Few_Absolutes tells us more :
Wellllll ... I'm not 100% sure that someone DIDN'T see it. People are such backstabbers in my office that no one would ever say it to your face; they'd just gossip about you at the water cooler.
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  GDI  |  0

It wants to leave me - woohoo
It wants to relieve me - woohoo
It'll never hurt me - woohoo

Woohoo - Hooo, Hooo

Don't trust a fart...
Never trust a fart....
Don't trust a fart...

'Cause a fart won't trust me....

By  plexico  |  3

More cunning and dangerous than the shart from "Jaws."

What was fake about the family emergency? You prevented your family name from being indelibly stained.