Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was home on leave and having breakfast with my parents and my younger brothers. I guess I got too used to the rougher language around the Army barracks where I'm stationed. At the breakfast table, I asked my Mom to "pass me the f***ing butter." FML
Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML
Today, while making small talk with a veteran, I made the mistake of using the phrase "Cost an arm and a leg". He was a double amputee. FML
Today, my dad drunkenly ranted about how I should volunteer for the military because of the crisis in the Middle East. I refused; I'm in college on two scholarships and have listened to stories of why his service still gives him nightmares. I had to hide all the phones to keep him from calling the recruiters. FML
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, I bought some flowers. As I was checking out, the cashier asked, "Aww, these for your mom? How sweet." I responded they were for a girl I liked. She laughed and said, "Sorry…" FML
Today, I saw some servicemen sitting outside a café, and I went over to thank them for their service. They waited till after I was done shaking their hands before they told me that they were just actors on their lunch break. FML
Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
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Top comments
Dusk1 0
We should ship your mother over to Iraq. God bless our soldiers.
alwaysalady 0
That's awful. I give soldiers hugs and tell them thank you. Your mom needs to learn a little respect.
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Comments (721)
mehwhateverr 0
FYL. Your mom sounds mean, though. Soldiers are (for the most part) valiant people who have to go through much heartache and trauma.
mehwhateverr 0
By the way, I clicked YDI because I misread the fml at first (I thought YOU said those things about the troops.)
GrafxLvr 0
Well said #472.
snowboarda96 0
your mom is retarded the war is not a waste of time.
sarahface555 0
Number 243, was it? Don't worry, no one wants to ******* touch you. It's people like you that make us look bad. Believe it or not, their are good people out there that want to fight for others. That want to fight for this country. You don't even deserve to go be in the service. I feel for anyone that has to work near you. I hope you get your balls blown off.
wrestling49 0
for those of u who are upset about the war this is wat i think...support the soldiers you should always do tht, and if u dnt then u can go live in another country. someone said tht the USA got bailed out of WW2 and was saved by the nazis and japs, thts wrong. The USA saved everyone else. and wat we shud've done with the war in the middle east after 9/11 was drop a very very big NUCLEAR BOMB and just blow the shit out of everything. Osama wudn't survive tht. and then our problems with terriorist and the rest of the world wud've been solved.
eriad1019 0
"and wat we shud've done with the war in the middle east after 9/11 was drop a very very big NUCLEAR BOMB and just blow the shit out of everything." You are kidding. You ARE kidding, yes? I can't tell if this is meant to be sarcastic in favor of the war, or actually endorsing a near genocide.
garry24 0
**** your bitch ass mom
missmishi08 0
wow your mom is a bitch!
HumansSuck 0
I agree with your mom.
FuzzyWalnuts 0
Those soldiers dieing overseas are the reason your mom has the ****** right to say that shit. You better have told her off or you're just as pathetic.