Today, my husband had a colonoscopy. Having spent yesterday hearing him complain about having only clear liquids and having to drink the required solution, he still was not cleaned out. We have to reschedule with two days of clear liquids. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after fasting for 24 hours and drinking 2 buckets of laxatives, my doctor's office notified me that my colonoscopy had been cancelled. I'd just finished the prep by taking the fart pills, and now have the cleanest colon ever. A lot of time spent on the toilet that I’ll never get back though. FML
Today, after following the directions and drinking a gallon of what can only be described as an industrial strength laxative for a scheduled colonoscopy. I shit my brains out for nearly 12 hours. The hospital then called and canceled my procedure an hour before my arrival time. FML
Today, after drinking a half gallon of liquid laxative in preparation for a colonoscopy, I puked the half gallon of laxative. Out my nose. FML
Today, because of my life situation, I was told I'll have to have a colonoscopy without anesthesia. FML
Today, I was informed by my proctologist that my colonoscopy has been rescheduled for my birthday. FML
Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML
Today, I found out that since no other procedures are working, I was required to stop eating, and drink a bunch of foul tasting "goo", which will in turn give me constant diarrhea. This will then prepare me nicely for the long tube with a camera on the end of which will be shoved up my rectum. FML
Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML
Today, my kid has severe diarrhoea. My husband said he was going out to get medicine. Two long, painful hours later, I find he's out eating and chilling with his friends. FML
Today, after being constipated for four days post-surgery, I have gotten diarrhea. It doesn't actually help getting the hard plug out, but it has found slow passages around it, so I’m still left to my own devices. This is not the kind of gold I’d like to be digging for. FML
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Top comments
Yudith 28
Have your husband been eating grape Jello or drinking chocolate milkshake while you were not looking? Because those things can cause the doctors to reschedule a coloscopy, with an extra day of clear revenge, er, liquids.
TomeDr 25
My brother is pretty heavy. He also had to have two days of fasting and clear liquids. I suggest you make LOTS of jello.
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Comments (3)
Yudith 28
Have your husband been eating grape Jello or drinking chocolate milkshake while you were not looking? Because those things can cause the doctors to reschedule a coloscopy, with an extra day of clear revenge, er, liquids.
TomeDr 25
My brother is pretty heavy. He also had to have two days of fasting and clear liquids. I suggest you make LOTS of jello.
LEAE_fml 4
no he didn't cheat and didn't have anything red or purple.