Today, accustomed to dealing with my old car's faulty accelerator, I pressed the pedal way too hard in my new car and crashed into a pillar, totaling the engine, and giving myself a concussion. I could still see the dealership down the street. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, the day after I bragged about never having a car accident in my life, I mistakenly put my car into Drive instead of Reverse and crashed into my own house. FML
Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML
Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML
Today, I ran into a car. I suffered a concussion and broke my nose. I wasn't driving. I walked right into it. It was parked. FML
Today, I was supposed to deliver my S/O's keys to the garage, where he got his car fixed after a minor accident. I pulled out of my alley, only to have my flip flop catch on my accelerator, causing me to hit another car passing by. FML
Today, I finished installing a brand new engine in my old car. It cost just over $6000. Later, I was waiting at a red light and an uninsured drunk driver smashed into it head on. It's completely totaled. I got to drive it 5 miles. The car is worth $1000, even with a new engine. FML
Today, I was running late for work. As I hurried out the door, I managed to trip over my own feet, fall off the front porch, and key my new car. FML
Today, my girlfriend's parents asked if I could move their car. I started the engine and began to accelerate, not noticing that the automatic transmission was on R. I drove right into a wall behind me, shattering the rear lights. Now I owe them $150 for repairs. FML
Today, I was in a car accident while driving to my brother's school to drop off some documents that he had to bring in, and forgot at home. While not even driving at 20 km/h, I started drifting on an icy spot. I hit a road sign and my car fell into a ditch. I probably have a concussion. FML
Today, while driving to work, some asshole stopped sharply on the 60 mph highway because he almost hit the car in front of him. Even with maintaining my distance, and slamming on the brakes, I still ruined the front end of my car on his dented bumper. I haven't even had the car for a year, and I'm still the one at fault. FML
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Top comments
ZoroMiHawk 25
You never at any point in time thought about pressing the brake? If you crashed hard enough to total the engine and give yourself a concussion, you must have been going at a fairly high enough speed, meaning you had a few seconds to brake.
DraftHail614 17
So you just floor it every time you drive?
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Comments (13)
RichardPencil 30
For the best night’s sleep in the whole wide world, visit MyPillar.com!
Dave_Davington 33
For a moment there, I actually thought you were a spambot. Almost clicked the little report to moderator button and everything.
RichardPencil 30
If I’m a spambot, the human race ought to throw in the towel and submit to their robot overloads. No, I’m a real boy! Go, **** sapiens, go! C > Si!
ZoroMiHawk 25
You never at any point in time thought about pressing the brake? If you crashed hard enough to total the engine and give yourself a concussion, you must have been going at a fairly high enough speed, meaning you had a few seconds to brake.
DraftHail614 17
So you just floor it every time you drive?
RudyH621 25
Ohh Spongebob, whyyy? - Mrs. Puff
NostalgiaFreak9 41
Time to turn in your license Spongebob.
Lobby_Bee 17
Sounds like someone bought a Challenger Hellcat. You're not the first and you won't be the last. 700hp RWD platform isn't for driving scrubs.
Moxie Mettle 10
Obviously you didn't test drive it first! You earned that one! Life in the fast lane. I can't drive 55?
Rhett_15 22
What an idiot!
thatslifeiguess7 16
Why are you in the road? you need a lifetime uber account
sweetbliss3 37
okay. I might get having to press the pedal down because that's what you're used to, but did the steering wheel not work either? couldn't have just turned it a bit?