Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML
Today, I was going down on my boyfriend. I'm usually in control and do my own thing. He tried taking control and I ended throwing up on him. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML
Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try “things” while under the influence. I suggested he go down on me; he thought about it for a second and then said, “I would, but I don’t want to get scared when I take a look.” FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML
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Top comments
darth1 18
Honestly that sounds like a fun way to end things.
mimiminx 23
You had to 'finally talk' your boyfriend into going down on you and now he's too scared to have sex with you after rolling off the bed?! He sounds like a bit of a pussy!
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Comments (136)
limabeans101029 21
It's funny because if the genders of this FML were the other way round, the comments would be a lot different.
1R1X0X0 10
What kind of homophobic kid are you dating?
hazardmuffin 21
How does that even make sense?
PapaSmurffolks 7
Let him know thats the best part of going down on you. Tell him welcome to man hood. Now all he has to do is work on his dismount.....
kievking 14
thighs the limit?
AviProspering 5
Interesting
katina1236 20
Gators roll like that to tear flesh off not to snap the neck but if the neck gets snapped during the spin then it's a win for the gator. Crocs and gators drown their victims.
sugarbear0727 19
Lmfao!! That's too funny. Sorry about losing your sex privileges, that's not fun. :/
Omniprism 15
Oh geez tell him to get over it. Laugh it off and go again. Maybe a heart to heart and ask him what he's so afraid of.
Epikouros 32
You need a better lover, Xenia. I'd love to have sex crocodile-style.
Alitas 11
This is hilarious!! Give him time he'll realize quickly that what you did is a good thing!!