Friends, Cars and Drugs: Don't drugs and drive

Don't drugs and drive

By Anonymous - 03/01/2022 13:59

Today, a friend of mine borrowed my car, drove it on drugs, fell asleep at the wheel, and smashed it. Don’t worry though, he’s fine, but my car was described as a “write off”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 004

You deserved it 288

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Same thing different taste

By Sam - 03/12/2011 10:03 - United States

Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 037

You deserved it 9 630

By MyLife - 03/03/2019 12:00

Today, my best friend broke up with her partner. In retaliation, he got drunk and stole my car, then crashed it into a neighbour's house. Then after dealing with the police who didn't arrest him, he and my best friend made up and went to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 613

You deserved it 198

By wtfman101 - 28/08/2009 14:56 - United States

Today, I woke up to find the entire driver's side of my car wrecked. Front door, back door, front and rear bumper smashed to shit. A drunk driver had hit it the previous night and ran. Don't worry though, he stopped and left his insurance information. He keyed it into the undamaged side of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 032

You deserved it 2 720

Live from the chopper

By cpiro - 27/05/2020 05:00

Today, my friend borrowed my car and decided to get pulled over after a high speed chase. My car got towed in a town over 100 miles away. Choose your friends wisely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 532

You deserved it 341

Stick to sidewalks

By Anonymous - 24/06/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, after my car got stolen and flipped on its roof three months ago, making it an insurance write-off, and getting a new car a week ago, a drunk driver crashed into my parked car, writing it off. In both instances the drivers were thankfully OK, it's just my insurance premiums skyrocketing, no biggie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 68

Wrecked

By Anonymous - 16/04/2023 22:00 - Albania

Today, I crashed my brother's car. All my friends know about this and not a single person has ask if I'm OK, even my dad and brother don't seem to be worried about me. Only my mother and I are sad because I don't know how to pay for a new car, the old one is in pieces. Thank god I'm alive but maybe dead would've been better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 685

You deserved it 383

By dmanrique - 04/10/2011 15:10 - United States

Today, my friend decided to jump out of a moving car. I had to explain to the nice old lady who stopped that my friend who was convulsing on the ground wasn't on drugs, he's just really stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 461

You deserved it 3 223

By Anonymous - 28/05/2016 23:05 - Netherlands

Today, my brother "borrowed" my car and keys without asking me. He came back 4 hours later, alone and pale faced. It took half an hour of questions, interrogation, and finally threats before he admitted that my car is sitting in a ditch a few miles away, probably totaled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 282

You deserved it 901

By pedestrian - 26/01/2011 05:07 - United States

Today, I let my friend borrow my car. She parked it in a towing zone, and it was towed. The best part is, it was towed by a bogus towing company. The cops assure me it's safe in a chop shop somewhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 044

You deserved it 4 579

Groundhog Day

By Steve - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - New Zealand

Today, I had a car accident. In the same place, at the same time, and with the same friend in the passenger seat as last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 761

You deserved it 11 920

RichardPencil 30

Monday 3 January 2022 15:48

That's on you. My grandpa always said: There are two things you never lend out: your car and your wife. Neither will come back the same.

mike3775 35

Monday 3 January 2022 16:14

This is why I never let anyone(except my kids) drive my vehicles.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 3 January 2022 15:48

That's on you. My grandpa always said: There are two things you never lend out: your car and your wife. Neither will come back the same.

mike3775 35

Monday 3 January 2022 16:14

This is why I never let anyone(except my kids) drive my vehicles.

xxWTFxx1981 23

Monday 3 January 2022 21:06

Letting someone borrow your car is like lending money don't do it unless you are okay with not getting it back... YDI

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The Top

Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 106

You deserved it 3 100

Today, I realized I’ve been saying “a whole nother” instead of “a whole other” my entire life. It wasn’t until my friend pointed it out with a smirk I’ve been speaking in an alternate universe. He was also the one to point out last year that my use of "like" every three words was "annoying and cringe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 433

The Top

Today, working as a CNA, my nurse convinced me that in order to collect a stool sample, you had to have the patient take a dump in your hand. I only found out he was kidding after I collected the sample. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 994

You deserved it 5 054

Today, I checked my bank account that I've been saving money in since I was a kid for college. I have $100 left out of the $10,000 I had last month. Apparently my parents thought buying a pool and an HDTV for themselves was more important than my college education. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131 732

You deserved it 6 457

Today, I'd practiced for a slam poetry night all day. When I got up on stage, I forgot all of it and, for some reason, and my brain refused to improvise around my planned themes, so I launched into a totally unrelated rant about how confusing microwaves are. FML

I agree, your life sucks 318

You deserved it 199

Today, I won an argument against a sexist co-worker. When I left later on, I jumped into my car to drive home, but managed to reverse it into a parked excavator. Guess who's going to hear virginal jokes about women drivers from now on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 790

You deserved it 17 980

Today, I stopped by McDonald's with my brother. I asked him what he wanted and I repeated his order. The lady said, "We don't have that here." I stupidly answered, "That's weird. We have it where I come from," and she replied, "Where did you come from honey, 1995?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 147

You deserved it 565

Today, we got my dad an iPad for his birthday. I had to repeatedly reassure him that he could in fact touch the screen without being shocked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 560

You deserved it 4 029