Dick move

By facepalm - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to stop measuring his penis during our conversation. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 787
You deserved it 4 530

Top comments

muffinXmonster 12

Must have been a lengthy conversation.... ;)

spekledworf 18

First measurement was probably 4 inches.... retake was required


hernando240411 0

Call me stupid, but i dont see "Conceded" anywhere in the fml....

ThisIsMyReign 4

He's multitasking. Don't worry OP he still hears you loud and clear.

Guys who measure there dick frequently usually aren't packin. Fyl OP

princess151617 4

Finally, a grammar nazi I can get on board with.

Eye can spell write but I chose not too. Get of muai Bach you darn trolls!

lrgenesis 19

Eye no it's phun two tipe with bad grammars butt it duznt look gud on a colege rezumay...

The_Troller 14

Water u guise tawkin bout? I thot ur spose to tlk lyek dis.

Damn you 62, I was brushing my teeth web I read that, it came out of my nose. +1 for you good sir.

Am I the only one that read 49 in a stereotypical Irish accent?

sycosyd_97 1
shihtzupup98 3


Jakesterk96 8

OP-"So Katie said-" BF-"Yes! Six and a half inches!!!"

MeLuvBewbs 7

He just wants to keep you safe. A very long penis can really hurt someone. As I have heard...

There was this one time, this girl refused to give her boyfriend a *******, and he ****-slapped her across the face so hard, she put it on fml. Try doin that with a needle dick.

Needle dick? I could imagine that penetrating steel, lol.

spekledworf 18

long dicks can hurt, I am the unfortunate girlfriend of a larger man... ;)

spekledworf 18

First measurement was probably 4 inches.... retake was required

#4 that comment was a very inexperienced one

spekledworf 18

I'm a little short of good remarks today

tattooedcowboy 6
ak4608 8

Spekledworf- 77 FML attempts?? Shitty life?

spekledworf 18

Haha not all from me, 90% are from my boyfriend when I "do something FML worthy"

jojoboy 0

Guy probably got excited it said 10.... He relooked, 10cm Retake

As inappropriate as that is, it's good because it means that he is completely comfortable with you. Sorry though/:

These things are important to a man, I wouldn't mind my girlfriend mesuring her bra size while talking with me.

But you see, we don't measure our bra size. It's already on the bra.

Well, unless Its a really serious topic, a guy would not be able to pay attention when theres a topless girl in the room. Who am I kidding, no topic trumps topless girls.

SecretMe00 5

What guy wouldn't want to watch a chick size her breasts...

guys who would NOT want to see a topless girl are: 1) gay guy 2) brother 3) transexual i could go on but i think i made my point

It the number one most asked question by women who are looking for a quick hookup. A man has to know it, what I would be worried about if I were you is who is wanting to know.