Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
United States
Clever girl
Today, I was in a public restroom when my almost-two-year-old figured out how to open the door and run out. Half-a-dozen strangers watched me scramble to pull up my pants and moon everyone before running after her. FML
Top comments
Welshite 40
I think in this case people will understand. I was leashed as a child to prevent my running off.
Pwn17 25
No. Just... No.
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Comments (105)
HopelesslyCiara5 19
That's poopy.
Pwn17 25
No. Just... No.
Altie 13
Haha best comment ever!
HopelesslyCiara5 19
I had the opportunity to be the first commenter and it's the first thing that came to mind.
\ 28
Doesn't look like phrases like these will be effectively wiped out anytime soon... Sniff.
Sports_guy3 28
According to DocBastard, they are Grammar Nazis. They were staring because they secretly want your ass.
SlapAndTickle 20
#65 Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
deviking 10
Atleast he didn't say the dreaded phrase that shall not be mentioned.
klovemachine 24
YES...just yes B-)
angelwing13 5
Really? Are you 5?
Welshite 40
I think in this case people will understand. I was leashed as a child to prevent my running off.
tpm45 25
I had a leash too. And a fence. And locks on every door. Slave child = story of my life.
annie_nk 23
This FML is a good example for why a kid leash is a good idea.
Jamescripps 3
good dog
xStaciexLynnx 15
Or you could just pay attention to your kid in public and hold their hand...
luckyone365 7
who holds someone's hand on the toilet?
Zebediabolical 45
I save my leashing for other consenting adults.
JustKittyKat 24
51, the combination of your comment and photo is wonderful.
DanielleinDC 34
I'm not a parent, but I suspect both her hands were busy readjusting her clothing or dealing with the other tasks of using the facilities.
cmars3 7
You've obviously never looked after a child before. It's very difficult to keep them holding onto your hand.
ohcheriecherie 20
it happens to everyone! I've closed the stall door for many a mother. no ones judging you, op
kevin_brown 2
not completely true, depends on the person
DixieNormous007 4
you could be one of those parents with their kid on a leash
munchly 17
Gotta love kids, I can't keep them from figuring out baby locks for the life of me!
gabagabaheyu 10
All of these incidents that make me not want to have kids...or put it waaay off.
SWC_Penguin 17
I had 'em young so I had the energy to keep up! The thought of babies after 40 sends a chill through me.
gabagabaheyu 10
my aunt is 50 and my cousin is just turning 12.. it was the wierdest thing to me. i agree with you though.
annie_nk 23
Why any woman over 40 would want to have a baby is beyond me. Thank god for menopause.
JMichael 26
It's really not that bad, children that age like to explore. You just gotta let them learn the boundaries.
TheGreatPotato 19
My mother had me when she was over 40 and 10 years after she had my brother. Although I am quite glad she did have me, I haven't the slightest idea what she was thinking.
phatdaddy62 23
33, she was probably thinking "OOPS! Dammit!"
rocker_chick105 31
My Mom was 43 when she had me. A major benefit from it was the fact that they have plenty of money saved for college and what not.
strawberrywine22 30
I was the unplanned fifth child (the next youngest being ten when I was born) when my mother was 40. The down sides? I got embarrassed when I was younger because my friends thought she was my grandma. My oldest brother is old enough to be my father. Aaand there was no college fund left for me because it got spent on my *planned* siblings.
HanBroman 20
I know a family who had two teenage boys and decided to have two more little girls at 44 and 46. I remember my mother saying to me how sad it is that the kids won't get to have their mother around for as long as other kids. how right she was. The mother (at 50) died of a heart attack last year. of course no one can predict that kind of tragedy but seeing her daughters at the funeral, too young to really understand what was going on, was the saddest thing. Anyway at least the girls are lucky to have two adult brothers to look after them.
siggy_mcsigx 22
My mother was 48 and my father was 55 when they had me, so yeah my parents were always older than my friends' parents. Now I'm 20 and they are going on 60 and 75.
fantasyworld 39
My parents were 35 and 38 when I was born. I can see the pros and cons to having kids both young and older.
skittycat213 19
Oh fun... I remember doing that to my mom when I was about 3. I feel sorry for my mom now of course, but at the time I thought it was a game!
mikey38654 3
You honestly remember occurrences from when you were 3? *wow* :-)
skittycat213 19
Yes, actually. I remember quite a bit from my early childhood. Truth be told most of it I wish I didn't though.
fantasyworld 39
When I was three I ran out of a store. My mom, who was in a boot cast, had to chase after me.
rockne93 17
Hope you have a nice butt
killerclowns 8
Kids, gotta love 'em
evildemonchild 18
Keep your child on a kid leash. When I was little I always run off so my parents put me on a kid leash to prevent me from taking off.
Altie 13
Kids suck..
mattyiscool123 26
Well you know something you suck!
omgbrainZ_fml 24
You know, you were a kid once, so that means you suck too.
The_Tenth_Doctor 14
She's only a child so it's understandable. Alot of people like to blame the parent but they tend to forget small children tend to have so many things on thier mind you can't do much but stop them or say no, and that sucks about the people seeing your bottom half.