skyblueprincess

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Skyblueprincess's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 19/09/2015 18:58 - United States - San Marcos

Today, I sneezed so hard that I re-dislocated my shoulder. FML

agreeclassic 23 932

vote type 1 1 819

Go home, you're drunk

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Hungary - Budapest

Today, my mother-in-law turned up at my doorstep close to midnight, drunk off her tits, crying about how my wife is punishing her and throwing her life away by marrying me. FML

agreeclassic 24 783

vote type 1 1 705

Enough is enough

By Anonymous - 19/09/2015 05:45 - Canada - Victoria

Today, I was confiding in my grandma about how lonely I am and how everything in my life seems to be falling apart. While I was in mid-sentence, she rolled her eyes and made a show of removing her hearing aid. FML

agreeclassic 22 952

vote type 1 3 289

By IamHM - 19/09/2015 22:43 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I found my diamond earring, which had gone missing. The vet had to surgically remove it from my dog. Despite having made the voyage through the dog's digestive tract, the earring is more expensive than ever. FML

agreeclassic 21 676

vote type 1 1 920

IamHM app_comment_confession_title

IamHM 14

Sunday 20 September 2015 22:37

Bingo! He's a black lab. And apparently likes shiny things.

By Severus_Snape_ - 20/09/2015 07:11 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I got a mosquito bite on my wrist. Maybe I'm paranoid, but I am pretty sure mosquito bites are not supposed to start crawling up to your armpit while swelling. FML

agreeclassic 26 098

vote type 1 1 675

Severus_Snape_ app_comment_confession_title

Severus_Snape_ 23

Sunday 20 September 2015 23:11

Wow, this is the first time one of my FMLs have been accepted! I googled whatever was happening on my arm, and I think 26 may or may not be right. According to the internet, if should go away in a few days, and it was a spider bite. But ever since I was a kid, I've always attracted some weird bug bites, but this has never happened to me before. Unfortunately, I am the type of person that will twist my wrist and still just say that I'm fine. Like that time where I threw up twice when I was 11 years old and still insisted that I was well enough to go to school, only to be sent back home when I threw up again. I applied some type of cream thing on the bite, and it has gotten better. It'll probably go away in a few days. Hopefully.