"Your degree will open so many doors" By Lewis - 18/12/2018 00:30 The way I live determined, that was a lie! I agree, your life sucks 220 You deserved it 113 Share Tweet Share
Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I'd left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML I agree, your life sucks 24 307 You deserved it 3 970
Today, it's my birthday, and I had one to many and my best friend and my boyfriend had to take me home. We went back to my apartment and all squeezed together in my bed. During the night I got sick and spent the rest of the night on the bathroom floor. Later I found out that they'd fucked in my bed. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 418 You deserved it 365
Today, I found out that falling asleep with a bobby pin in your hair means waking up with one jammed in your ear drum. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 575 You deserved it 391
Today, thinking I was alone at work, I did an impression of Goldar from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I turned around to find out I wasn't alone; a cute girl was staring at me, unimpressed. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 936 You deserved it 20 328
Today, I drove my car and suddenly I got diarrhea & shit my pants. I put a plastic bag under me to not let all the shit go through my pants and get to my seat. Then, one of my work mates saw my car and came to say hello, she saw all the shit and the plastic bag. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 234 You deserved it 301
Today, I was idly scratching gunk off the common computer while waiting for a meeting to start. It wasn't until the end that I realized it was dried snot. FML I agree, your life sucks 388 You deserved it 112
Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML I agree, your life sucks 390 You deserved it 139
Today, my social-awkwardness is so bad, I was actually proud of myself for managing to ask someone a question. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 043 You deserved it 4 994