Love: Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp...

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 06:03 - United States - Demorest

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 039

You deserved it 3 908

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Same thing different taste

Gross out competition

By shattysituation - 31/12/2012 22:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 415

You deserved it 4 054

Hiking is so much fun!

By Sacho - 24/10/2019 20:00

Today, 4 miles into a mountain hike with my crush, I suddenly felt a stomach pain, followed by the urge for explosive diarrhea. I had to stand still with my butt clenched to prevent shitting myself. There were no nearby bathrooms, and I didn't have any toilet paper. It was messy. She'll never see me the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 799

You deserved it 170

Put the booze down

By Anonymous - 13/08/2020 14:01

Today, I shat myself in front of my girlfriend's family, after drinking too much the previous night and waking up with major stomach problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 559

You deserved it 2 079

Like a dog

By Jick - 26/02/2023 14:00

Today, I was outside when I was suddenly overcome by an intense need to shit. The back door was locked, so I tried to run to the front, but couldn't make it. As I squatted in the bushes, my girlfriend came home unexpectedly. She screamed and called me a sick, disgusting freak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 294

By ohmygoodness - 02/03/2009 21:51 - United States

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 720

You deserved it 17 288

By Anonymous - 13/11/2009 00:05 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was throwing a birthday party and got very drunk. She needed help getting to the bathroom so I picked her up and walked her to the toilet. Assuming she needed to throw up, she instead takes a huge, monstrous crap right in front of me. I can't look at her the same ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 453

You deserved it 8 859

Cringe

By mikesok988 - 07/05/2009 07:40 - United States

Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 474

You deserved it 4 811

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 292

You deserved it 7 527

By coolhand - 29/08/2009 15:13 - United States

Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 513

You deserved it 67 439

Dirty sex

By Anonymous - 20/11/2022 06:00 - Canada - Burlington

Today, I was in my girlfriend's room when she walked in after getting out of the shower, wearing just a towel. She removed it and I was inches away from going down on her when I noticed she hadn’t wiped properly, either before or after her shower. She'd complained about stomach problems earlier, but regardless… FML

I agree, your life sucks 951

You deserved it 127

dirton89 7

Sunday 27 January 2013 15:57

FYL but hey...you gotta do what you gotta do. She understands hopefully

sleepinginclass 8

Sunday 27 January 2013 17:00

You were fine until you said to spray axe.

Comments

buddy51 23

Sunday 27 January 2013 17:26

You didn't actually seduce her yet...you grossed her out instead. Way to go!!! A guaranteed sexless life from now on!!!!

IconicLemon 8

Sunday 27 January 2013 17:31

Gross her out? as long as he didnt put an image in her head by saying "oh wow needed that shit" or come back smelling of it, i would hardly doubt it. And besides we all do it, nothing to be ashamed off, just dont go telling everyone about it. Given not a nice image of anyone ********, but it happens and cant be helped.

JanisEvans 10

Sunday 27 January 2013 17:57

What are you? 12?

buddy51 23

Monday 28 January 2013 4:30

11. Precocious though.

Enslaved 36

Sunday 27 January 2013 17:37

Not with that crusty, smelly ass crawling back into bed without showering and freshening up first. :P

edd1987 9

Sunday 27 January 2013 17:53

Noor!!!

efrainelboricua 12

Sunday 27 January 2013 20:16

Anyone else curious to if op is a boy or if this is a lesbian couple?

j_cat187 19

Monday 28 January 2013 6:01

I don't know, does it matter?

jatinbhanot 6

Sunday 27 January 2013 21:24

the best you can do is act cute and hope she likes you enough to not get disgusted.. :)

rockbandaddict85 22

Sunday 27 January 2013 21:28

I wouldn't worry much. its a perfectly human bodily function. can be embarrassing at times. leave it be. the more you drawl attention to it the worse it will be.

picturescrazy 24

Sunday 27 January 2013 22:09

Turn on the sink or bathroom fan (or both...) next time! It happens, but if you know it's going to be noisy, it helps to at least try to cover it up!

shaww 28

Sunday 27 January 2013 22:45

FYL... too bad it was that type of poop, usually you can hold it in

smacka98 1

Sunday 27 January 2013 23:29

unless she has a poop fetish.

missababgaga 19

Sunday 27 January 2013 23:39

Maybe that will make her more comfortable around you if she ever needs to do the same! If anything, she might appreciate that you were able to do that with her nearby because it would show her that you're comfortable around her as well, even though that wasn't the case at the time. Hopefully all went well :) (and hopefully I made sense)