Today, our new boss showed up for his first day of work. I thought I'd seen it all, but he demands that we say "Hail to the King" every time he passes through the office. When I called HR about it, the guy on the other end told me to "man up and deal with it". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my new coworker told me he expects me to call him King Kong and bow down to him whenever he walks past. FML
Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML
Today, I showed up to my new job early, hoping to impress my new boss. When he arrived, he walked by me and muttered, "Fucking tryhard." FML
Today, my new boss, the CEO's son, finally showed up for work, three days late and right after lunch break. His first order of business was to call a meeting and scream at everyone for not having a diet latte waiting for him on his desk. God help us all. FML
Today, I met the new boss, who kicked the door open looking 15 years-old, with sunglasses on hiding his hangover, threw his bag on the desk knocking everything over, and greeted me with, “What the hell you doing in my office, bro?” This is going to be a complete disaster, I can feel it. FML
Today, we got a new manager in his 20’s who has never worked our industry before. His introductory speech included, “and you will respect me as your superior.” Our veterans have pranked him three times already and he blames me because mine is the only name he seems able to remember. FML
Today, I called my new boss by my old boss's name during a meeting. My new boss said nothing, but just glared at me in silence. Somehow, I think he wasn't impressed. FML
Today, my new boss lost his shit and flew into a ten minute rant against me about the "value of respect". He told me that if I wanted to stay in "his" company, I'd best start toeing the line. All this because I corrected his misuse of "your" and "you're" in one of his memos. FML
Today, at my new job, I walked into the office to hear my supervisor and HR manager talking about how, "the new guy isn't very smart, but we can get him to do the shit work for a couple weeks." Gee, thanks. FML
Today, a thirty-something guy swaggered into my workplace. He was wearing shutter shades and torn jeans, and claimed to be our new boss. I called security to throw him out, at which point he produced his ID and let me know I'd be attending an employee review session next week. FML
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Top comments
desireev 18
**** that!!! I'd tell him to shove it!! FYL
StoryOfTheYear 15
I suggest a rebellion.
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Comments (182)
Mantar11 0
that's not an fml, your boss sounds awesome
docscientist 10
This is what you do, op, have everyone greet each other with "Hail to the king," whenever you see one another.
mccutie936 6
You could tell him to shove his thumb up his butt.....
bobofomo1234 1
Lol you called HR??? Stop taking everything so seriously! And quit being a baby
HPfanatic2011 0
i want your boss.
briana17 0
haha you should say **** the king in a different language that he doesn't kno and when he asks wht you said? just be like I said hail the king in German or whatever(:
dius 0
Tell your boss that you have balls of steel. Promotion should comes quickly
dertylilfreek 2
Today I was walking home when some kids began throwing coins at me. Apparently, they thought I was homeless. FML
MexicanObama 15
YDI, that guy is a genius.
Scin 0
Ha ha. Duke Nukem Forever... I'd say it all the time lol