FML : Today, my husband told me he's just "not interested" in having sex anymore. FML

147

Today, my husband told me he's just "not interested" in having sex anymore. FML

brerj09 Say more :

Ok so I feel like I need to clarify a few things. I'm 21 and my husband is 27. We have been married less than a year. He has gone to the doctor about this before. His testosterone levels are within the normal range but just barely. He doesn't have ED. And it's not that I'm bad in bed... He has a very low sex drive. I have a normal sex drive. If he had his way we'd have sex like once a month. I'm not happy with that. Things were getting better but then he dropped this bomb on me last night. He isn't interesting in having sex and he's doesn't want to do anything to change that. And I'm abnormal because I want to have sex. We are going to be seeing a marriage counselor....

By brerj09 / Wednesday 27 July 2016 06:41 / United States

Intimacy

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Top comments

By puppies4life | 10

#6658794 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:32

I can't believe that people are saying to leave him. Switch the genders here and it wouldn't even have been featured. Anyway hopefully you guys can sort this out because love is still more important

By MedChew | 18

#6658768 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:14

This has got to be the blandest FML in a long time.

Sorry about his attitude, but I really need more info to pass any judgment here...

Comments

By v_tran | 5

#6658761 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:10

...... Sorry OP

Jonkbaby | 16

#6659507 - Thursday 28 July 2016 10:13

dump his as!!

Scorpio01 | 16

#6659640 - Thursday 28 July 2016 13:29

sex is not the only thing important in marriage

yungjigglypuff | 3

#7456756 - Thursday 18 May 2017 11:44

Its good he was honest with you even though its upsetting, hopefully you got your sex life issues settled (:

By Bullshitticus | 19

#6658762 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:11

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

By domolovesyoshi | 33

#6658763 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:11

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

Arkham_Callabero | 15

#6658868 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 18:08

Yes because we all know love is all about sex and nothing else, seriously if you continue to have that mentality you're going to have a sad and pathetic love life.

wartis4u | 11

#6659003 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 20:36

so you're telling me there reason for marriage is only for sex and that " it's going to be very frustrating for you." you call that a reason for divorce. you know you can still love someone. I don't think you are supposed to give relationship advice with that mentality

zman938 | 8

#6659068 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 22:14

You're one of those retards who thinks that sex is the only part of the relationship. It's not even the main part of the relationship it's the icing on the cake.

domolovesyoshi | 33

#6659157 - Thursday 28 July 2016 0:33

And you are misinterpreting me I am asexual myself so sex not important to me in a relationship, love is, I only said what I said because I have had this happen to me having been In relationships with many a sexual person who has gotten frustrated and ended up resenting me au was just trying to give op advice from personal experience but well done on the assumptions

domolovesyoshi | 33

#6659213 - Thursday 28 July 2016 1:39

pandalover69 | 26

#6659276 - Thursday 28 July 2016 3:09

But you're lumping OP in with your own experiences. They might not have the same problems as you.

domolovesyoshi | 33

#6659926 - Thursday 28 July 2016 19:49

I know that but I can't give the OP advice on any other kind of situation hence the "sorry this happened bit.

protospartan065 | 6

#6659952 - Thursday 28 July 2016 20:08

You realize the husband finding out he's asexual might not even be the case. The older men grow the lower their sex drive goes.

domolovesyoshi | 33

#6660150 - Friday 29 July 2016 0:47

He husband is 27 that's pretty young to be having this lack of libido

By MedChew | 18

#6658768 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:14

This has got to be the blandest FML in a long time.

Sorry about his attitude, but I really need more info to pass any judgment here...

lantz4levi | 19

#6658784 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:22

For real everybody on here is gonna be saying you need to leave him, he's just not worth it if he can't find the need to have sex or something stupid. He could be in his 70s for all we know, or he could have ED. So many possibilities.

askullnamedbilly | 33

#6658835 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 17:04

I've seen only one person who suggested she should leave him, the rest is providing solutions or suggestions on how to work through the problem.

MedChew | 18

#6658840 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 17:12

surprising honestly. Maybe FML's audience aged a bit. 9gaggers would have a field day trolling on any posts related to sex

Flyndaran | 10

#6659118 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 23:32

As someone with permanent impotence, there is a HELL of a big difference between not wanting to have sex and not being able to. My libido is also reduced, but not absent. SSRIs can make life possible but also very "soft".

By HeyPeople13 | 16

#6658770 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:14

Well if this is what you wanted in marriage other than true love, that's your fault

InfiniteSunshine | 32

#6658832 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 17:03

No it isn't, true love and sex can go hand in hand. For many people, (not saying everyone), sex is a big part of a healthy relationship, and there's nothing wrong with that. Sex is often an essential way that people connect to their partner, it's one of the most intimate things a person can do with their SO and one of the ways they show they love each other. To say that isn't important (for some people), and that wanting sex along with love is wrong, that isn't fair, sex is natural, to want sex with your partner isn't something that should be condemned.

By LadyLenore | 14

#6658773 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:15

This actually happens often, and doesn't mean he doesn't love you anymore. If you do still have a sexual need and both of you want to stay in this marriage, discuss something along the lines of a sexual partner outside the marriage. If he doesn't want you to have that, but can't provide either... choose between a sexless life or leaving him, but there's so many alternatives for this kind of problem. (Interesting Book: "The new I do" by Susan Pease Gadoua & Vicki Larson)

By Gastondeluxe | 15

#6658778 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:20

Time to talk, honey.

By captain_hero89 | 21

#6658780 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:21

it could be a low testosterone problem. i know guys in their early 30s that have that issue

ThrottleJockey | 34

#6658976 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 20:05

I can attest to that, I stopped making any really useful amount of testosterone in my early 20's and have been giving myself weekly IM injections ever since. It seriously affected my libido, energy, sleep, mood, weight, etc.

By Rosebudx | 32

#6658781 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:21

Could he be depressed? That can cause a loss of libido. Ask him about seeing a doctor, not necessarily for the sex loss but for the other side effects of depression if you suspect he is depressed.

By Jaraxxus_fml | 15

#6658782 - Wednesday 27 July 2016 16:21

Many females do this to men. Which still isn't cool, but perhaps try looking to see ways men have dealt with it (preferably without cheating). Good luck, OP.