By Widespread - 18/11/2009 08:43 - Australia

Today, my 5 year old lactose intolerant daughter decided to have some chocolate. The result: me cleaning the bathroom walls at 3am, finishing at 4:30am, and then start cleaning again at 5am when her stomach contents decided I had missed a spot. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 313
You deserved it 4 529

Australian315 tells us more.

Australian315 0

Hi I just joined up to FML after this comment got posted (as it was mine) and i just wanted to verify some things. a) my daughter only ate chocolate because a kid at school gave her some, even though her teachers know that she cant have any dairy b) I do keep all of the dairy in our house hidden c) she only spewed at 3am because she has late reactions, eg, around 12 hours after she eats the dairy please stop saying how im a bad parent. accidents happen.

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Top comments

Jewelofagal 2

#1 and #2 clearly have no children. Parents can do their best and their children will still find ways around obstacles when they're determined to do so. The good news is that natural consequences of her actions will help this little girl think twice before dis-obeying the rule about eating an item with dairy in it in the future.

30 6
paivarotti 0

You idiots expect them to lock their kids away from all outside influences? 5 year old's do go to school, and they have friends that they occasionally associate with outside of their parents supervision. It's impossible for the parent to supervise every second of every day of the child's life. It's damned easy for a kid to find chocolate. Think back to when you were a kid, if your parents banned you from doing something, then you damn well found a way to do it. If you didn't then you sucked as a kid.

26 3

Comments

ROFLDOCTOR 1

Rofl. I agree with some people here - just because the mother has chocolate in her house doesn't mean she's a bad parent. Why the hell should she have to get rid of all the chocolate just because one kid is lactose intolerant? Also, kids aren't smart, they're idiots. Just because they can fool others into getting them what they want doesn't make them smart. They don't know what they're doing and they ignore their parents and do what they were told NOT to do, and end up getting ****** one way or another for their stupid actions. To the OP, you just need to find a better hiding place for the chocolate. If you've got a job, maybe keep the chocolate somewhere at your work place or something where your daughter doesn't go. If your daughter got the chocolate somewhere outside of the house, hopefully she learns something from the situation and doesn't eat anymore chocolate.

1 1
gpstyne 0

way to watch the kid, but points for not giving her away to the babysitter...yet

0 6
crackedcym 0

don't complain that's all part of being a parent if you weren't ready for that maybe you shouldn't have had kids

4 4
myballs 0

You deserve it, you dumb ****. You knew your child was lactose intolerant, and yet you let her have chocolate anyways. She isn't going to ******* find it if you don't leave it laying around.

1 6
Witchcraft_fml 4

Since you're done cleaning that up, clean up my word-vomit now! OnetimeinsummercamptherewasthisonetimethatlikeohmygoodnessweallsataroundthecampfireanddecidedthatwewereallboredandcurioussowedecidedtoexperimentwitheachotherandthenIdecidedthatIlikeditandohmygoodnesswhycan'tIstoptalkingsomeonepleasestopmeohmygoodnessplease

2 8
graciedacie 0

Everyone else is getting so nit-picky about whether or not the OP is a good parent (I myself am on the team giving her the benefit of the doubt. A 5yo can easily get to some chocolate milk in the fridge. Perhaps there are other children in the home. Should they all be banned from dairy simply because they have a sibling that is lactose intolerant? I'm sure the little girl knew she was not supposed to drink chocolate milk) but what I don't understand is what the phrase "when her stomach contents decided I had missed a spot" is meant to imply! Am I to believe the kid threw up again BECAUSE the OP is an inadequate worker?

0 5
mileycyruslvrrrr 0

get lactaid. then she can eat whatever she wants. i thought i was lactose intolerant but then i found out i'm actually allergic to dairy. so i just drink rice milk and soy chocolate stuff. it's still just as good. and there is vegan cheese too. it's not really that big of a problem. and i heard lactaid works really well for lactose intolerance, so try it.

2 1
muichini 0

the stuff tastes so bad tho its worse then anything else, I would rather pay 14 more of soy milk.

0 0
bitca 0

Graciedacie - I'm pretty sure that the OP is just trying to be funny with her phrasing. I doubt she honestly believes the child was intentionally throwing up. I would say something like that without thinking it could be interpreted as you did.

3 0
graciedacie 0

I don't REALLY think she meant it the way it sounds. It just honestly doesn't make that much sense if you think about it, as written. If she wants to really stress the FML-ness of this situation, she should emphasize how she cleaned for over and hour and as soon as the area was spotless, the little girl pukes all over again.

0 2
Erindub 0

And this is why I'll never have kids.

1 3