Today I was told by my roommates that I need to socialize more... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By "Alex Babcock" - 15/11/2019 02:03

Today I was told by my roommates that I need to socialize more and that I should start by spending time with them. I walked out into the common room to spend time with them and they were both on their phones. apparently online videos are more important than spending time with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68

You deserved it 9

Epic Easter: Chases and Chutes
From egg hunts gone wrong to unforgettable family dinners, Easter has never been so much fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

Keywords

Insurance Money Plumbing Awkward Relatable Cheating Love AITA Relationship advice Suspicious Weird First Dates Marriage Health Gross Poopoo peepee Mental health Cars Death Family Parenting Kids Miscellaneous Transportation Capitalism My ex Instagram Friends Social Media Public freakouts

The Top

Today, during an episode of King of Queens that my boyfriend has seen more than once, I decided I'd try to get a little frisky. I straddled him while he was on the bed and began taking my clothes of. He pushed me out of the way and said, "Don't get naked in front of the TV." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 728

You deserved it 4 480

Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 020

You deserved it 115 199

The Top

Today, I woke up without my fiancé in bed next to me, but I assumed he'd gone to work early. I went on Facebook to find that he had posted a break-up post to himself from my account and set my status to single. I then found a note with "Sorry" written on it stuck to the kitchen counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 928

You deserved it 3 649

Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 329

You deserved it 3 528

Today, and for the first time in my life, I was unable to trust a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 224

Today, I went to the doctor to see if she could check a lump in my vagina. She pushed the lump and asked, "Does this make you want to use the bathroom for a number 2?" I said yes. Turns out, it’s hard poop pushing against my intestines and the outside vagina wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 161

Today, I got a spray tan for homecoming. While I was dancing, I got really sweaty and the spray tan rubbed off on the guy's white tux. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 843

You deserved it 51 105

Today, I was at the gym playing basketball. A very attractive girl chose me to be on her team. We were playing well and hitting it off. I had decided to ask for her number after the game, until I smashed the ball in her face, resulting in her having a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 370

You deserved it 3 442