Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate for the first time. He was sucking on my boob, everything was going good. He suddenly stopped and started choking really bad. He thought milk was coming out. Turns out, it was just his gum. The moment was ruined. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML
Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML
Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML
Today, I was eating lunch with my boyfriend when I started choking. My boyfriend took it as an opportunity to sneak food off my plate. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, in an effort to avoid my school's strict no-gum policy as my teacher made a b-line to me, I swallowed it. By the time the teacher reached me, the gum was on my desk, as well as my breakfast, thanks to my overactive gag reflex. FML
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Top comments
queen_awks 16
You could have just spat it out instead...
DocBastard 40
So now your boyfriend knows that you spit instead of swallowing.
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Comments (99)
DocBastard 40
So now your boyfriend knows that you spit instead of swallowing.
NickaPLZ 26
Gotta give her credit though, because she DID try swallowing first...
firefighter925 18
spitters are quiters
ICastillo 25
#15 that gag reflex will get ya.
Tali147 16
I don't have a gag reflex.
BinaryGuy 22
Don't you know that it can take up to 7 years for gum to pass through your body?? Not really... But seriously just spit it out.
DanielleinDC 34
Urban legend, #16. Snopes confirmed it. It may not be digested like food, but it moves through your digestive system with the rest of your food. OP, next time just tell your boyfriend you need to spit out your gum before you engage in a smooch session. Sheesh.
perdix 31
Looks like the foreshadowing of an awkward *******.
firefighter925 18
could b worse. u could of died
MsConfusedd 27
*you *you *have
TheRandomIndian 17
Be*
evilplatypus 39
53 - It makes you look ridiculous (i.e. stupid) and it's a violation of FML's policy: "TXT language and out of context comments are forbidden"
Vanillanougat 14
Aww just tell him you were pretending to be a mother bird, and that he was your baby ^_^
10showgirl 16
Lol Idk why you got thumbed down. I think it's funny.
Nicole1225 14
That must've been so sexy.
ICastillo 25
No one likes a spitter...
paprika_pilipili_fml 14
Why didn't you just throw it away ? O_o
t_raw1234 11
You should've just spit it out.
Tdrizzzzzly 19
How long is a few moments? Were you not breathing during this time???
panicsdisaster 17
Good thing it wasnt what rhymes with gum.
HowieDoIt 21
Let's see: we've got thumb, a bum, numb, or dumb(your comment, since 1 already said it).