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    mattcy1 - 31/01/2016 19:42 - Canada - Mississauga

    Today, I strained so hard to take a dump that my nose started bleeding. FML.
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    The rhythm of the fight
    Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

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    Today, I discovered that the vitamin I've been taking for hair growth actually works really well. Unfortunately, it only works on my leg hair. FML
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    Today, I made the discovery that I'm in a true love triangle; both of my girlfriends are dating one another. FML
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    Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML
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    Today, I learned that the girl I've been seeing for 6 months is actually married. She just dates me when her husband is pissing her off. FML
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    Today, my girlfriend of 3 months broke up with me via text and said she was keeping the cat. I've had the cat since for seven years since she was a kitten. FML
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    Today, my grandmother told me that since my dad was a mistake, I too am a mistake. FML
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