By Anonymous - Italy
  Today, after a hard day, I allowed myself a small solitary pleasure. As I was going at it, all of a sudden a little red dot appeared on my penis. A pimple? Nope. The laser that my neighbors were using to show me that I'd forgotten to close my curtains. FML
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That depends. In some jurisdictions in the United States, it's illegal to wander around nude in your own home without the curtains drawn, let alone engaging in "solitary pleasure". In 2009, Eric Williamson, of Springfield, Virginia, was arrested for being nude in his own home (he was making coffee at the time) when a neighbor saw him. He was eventually exonerated but the legal defense must have cost him a fair bit. And that was for simple nudity, nothing sexual about it.