Student Me vs Inner Me By FML Approved - 08/09/2017 03:30 - France - Paris The darkness calls... I agree, your life sucks 391 You deserved it 101 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML I agree, your life sucks 16 257 You deserved it 2 123
Today, I was working at the pharmacy and had a older man come in. He was buying Viagra and, by law, we are required to ask if the patient had any questions. His lovely response was, "When you coming over so I can test this stuff out?" His wife and daughter thought it was hilarious. I could've died. FML I agree, your life sucks 6 845 You deserved it 634
Today, I was feeling ill when I woke up. While on the bus to work, I threw up into a plastic cup. I had to sit for half an hour holding an open, very full, warm cup of vomit. FML I agree, your life sucks 5 760 You deserved it 574
Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML I agree, your life sucks 25 652 You deserved it 47 202
Today, I learned that a spontaneous romantic gesture of arriving home early with flowers and wine is not welcome when your wife is busy having sex with your brother. FML I agree, your life sucks 130 202 You deserved it 5 452
Today, the police finally recovered my stolen car. All it took was a shootout and two people dying. FML I agree, your life sucks 14 656 You deserved it 1 949
Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML I agree, your life sucks 89 155 You deserved it 9 251
Today, my husband guilt-tripped me for buying a $14 purse. According to him, my old one, with its busted zipper, frayed hems and holes in the interior, was still “perfectly good to hold all your crap.” I literally only have one purse. FML I agree, your life sucks 918 You deserved it 90