By FML Videos Shark Feeding Fail Feeding sharks is dangerous - you might lose something important! 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Lexington Today, I found out that someone had peed into the bottle of Febreze that we keep in the dorm bathroom. I found this out when I sprayed it onto my coat to get rid of a weird smell. FML I agree, your life sucks 48434 You deserved it 5035 71 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By neoteck - France Today, I was talking to a charming young lady on MSN by webcam. She suddenly asked me to take my glasses off for a minute; I did so, and she said, "Oh never mind, you're still just as ugly..." FML I agree, your life sucks 26015 You deserved it 2537 28 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By BDSM4Jesus - United States - Pittsburgh Today, while trying some new kinky things with my boyfriend, he cried out, "Call me Jesus!" Yeah... I think we're done with that. FML I agree, your life sucks 34988 You deserved it 4516 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - American Canyon Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML I agree, your life sucks 40584 You deserved it 7364 151 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By bumblebee - United Kingdom Today, I was hanging out with a guy I liked. We sat in the gardens, me facing the path, him with his back to it. We were in deep conversation when I noticed a dog that looked exactly like mine. Then I looked up and saw a man that looked like my dad. Yes - my parents followed me on a date. FML I agree, your life sucks 54927 You deserved it 3696 90 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ananomus - United States Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML I agree, your life sucks 35050 You deserved it 5851 142 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By caesarinozeppeli Today, after ordering it four weeks ago, I finally got the expensive figurine that I'd been wanting. Also today, my brother jizzed onto it. FML I agree, your life sucks 3994 You deserved it 376 28 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Samantha - United States Today, my boyfriend talked me into having drunk sex. Right after we started, my head hit a wall, knocking me out. I woke up to him taking pics of my tits. FML I agree, your life sucks 38185 You deserved it 12538 117 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I swerved to miss hitting a kitten, over-corrected, hit and killed the cat, and totaled my truck by hitting a parked car. FML I agree, your life sucks 29421 You deserved it 13826 142 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Mission Today, I was talking to one of my supervisors at my new job. He asked if I knew a professor at the school I recently graduated from, and I decided to babble on about how shitty of a professor he was and how much I loathed his class. He then looked at me and said, "That's my dad." FML I agree, your life sucks 12454 You deserved it 22391 65 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Noname - Canada Today, I was going to confess to my best friend that I am madly in love with her. I called her up only to find her crying. She was upset that she might be pregnant with some guy. FML I agree, your life sucks 38899 You deserved it 2873 47 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, a wild squirrel managed to get into my house. I can't see him but I hear him in the walls. FML I agree, your life sucks 29051 You deserved it 2592 217 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By TwiceDaily,Kids - United States Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML I agree, your life sucks 27820 You deserved it 5094 105 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lessinterestingthanadog - United States Today, I invited the guy I've been seeing to my home for the first time. He spent over an hour talking to my twelve-year-old dog. Occasionally he would look up to ask me a question, but when I answered he would just continue talking to the dog. FML I agree, your life sucks 30202 You deserved it 3778 51 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Penkkis - Finland Today, I was so lonely, I tried to hold hands with plastic "horror hand" I bought for Halloween. FML I agree, your life sucks 27506 You deserved it 9035 92 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Sophies - United Kingdom - Bristol Today, I woke up on Christmas morning to find that a large cock and balls had been keyed into the windscreen of my car. My new, two-week-old car, which I will be paying off for the next four years. FML I agree, your life sucks 40572 You deserved it 3121 83 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anya - Japan - Fukuoka Today, after being fed up with my sarcastic, mouthy daughter, I decided to remove her TV from her room. I dropped it on my foot and broke two toes. She promptly said, "that's what you get." FML I agree, your life sucks 8591 You deserved it 1768 56 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Lehigh Acres Today, I found out my husband pretends to be a young, bisexual woman online. As if that isn't bad enough, he flipped out and didn't believe me when I told him the other "young, bisexual women" he's been beating it to are probably middle-aged men too. FML I agree, your life sucks 22231 You deserved it 1666 70 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By stay in there - 17/4/2020 23:00 Dumbasses Today, I got a call from the local police station. Apparently, my idiot son and his equally dumb girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to have sex in the car at a park in broad daylight. They assumed no one would be there due to the quarantine. They were wrong. FML I agree, your life sucks 2068 You deserved it 263 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By mama bear Call the Midwife-slash-Locksmith Today, my one-year-old son locked me out of the house. I had no spare key and both him and my 4-month-old decided that was the perfect time to scream bloody murder. FML I agree, your life sucks 1365 You deserved it 295 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Oxford Today, for the nth time, my father reminded me that I should study things related to the "real" world, as if I was studying theology, astrology or something. I'm studying for a master's degree in physics. FML I agree, your life sucks 29410 You deserved it 2581 71 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - West Chester Today, my mother found my escaped pet snake after she had already washed and dried it with the laundry. FML I agree, your life sucks 31318 You deserved it 4305 129 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By catfish - United States Today, after class I was chatting with my teacher, a really cool and stylish old black guy. I tell him he reminds me of one of those soul dudes from those 70s movies, right down to the pimp-walk. He tells me he walks that way because he was beaten for drinking out of the wrong fountain as a kid. FML I agree, your life sucks 25242 You deserved it 51835 85 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By jibjab - Canada Today, I have a degree in electrical engineering, my wife was doing a crossword and asked me what are the units of capacitance, I couldn't remember. FML I agree, your life sucks 18998 You deserved it 9053 47 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I woke up finding out I had a wet dream last night. About someone other than my girlfriend. I don't remember anything about the dream, but my girlfriend remembers everything, aparently I talked through out my dream, she was right next to me listening. FML I agree, your life sucks 34629 You deserved it 5890 105 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By soaked - United States - Philadelphia Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML I agree, your life sucks 37307 You deserved it 9011 156 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By tstaeger - United States Today, I tried drinking "Smart Water" for the first time. I couldn't figure out how to open the bottle. FML I agree, your life sucks 12393 You deserved it 37718 174 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By cjbutterfly96 - United States Today, I was hanging out with a guy for the second time, and he was helping me buy a Christmas present for my dad. I excused myself to go to the bathroom, and when I came out, he was gone. He left me alone and took my dad's present with him. FML I agree, your life sucks 23355 You deserved it 2252 40 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pissed - United States Today, my husband called me from the store, trying to decide whether or not to buy the new games console he's been wanting. I'd already purchased one and hid it, ready for Christmas Day. I couldn't talk him into not buying himself one. There goes a $500 surprise. FML I agree, your life sucks 48023 You deserved it 6983 161 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By NotInTheRightPlace - United States - Falls Church Today, I had to appear in court. My boyfriend gave me a chocolate to eat for comfort. The quote on the wrapper read "Today, you are exactly where you should be." FML I agree, your life sucks 40987 You deserved it 6514 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By StuckInCollegeLimbo - United States - Riverside Today, after going through months of registration and orientation to transfer to a university, I was told that my application was denied because I didn't meet the minimum credit requirement. You couldn't tell me this before? FML I agree, your life sucks 3524 You deserved it 320 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my nephew spent a long while enthusiastically telling me how amazing his new 3D TV system is. I felt his pain as his face turned white when he remembered that I'm blind in one eye since birth. FML I agree, your life sucks 32433 You deserved it 2571 149 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By MoxyR12 - United States Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML I agree, your life sucks 48555 You deserved it 5661 83 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ohhhemmgee - United States - Reno Today, I locked myself out of the house I was house-sitting. An hour later, and my fifth attempt at climbing the fence, I figured I'd try the door one more time. Turns out I was turning the handle the wrong way and the door wasn't locked in the first place. FML I agree, your life sucks 8741 You deserved it 29307 83 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Jonoq - Canada Stress factor 11 Today, in a 2-hour period at work, I had to talk to the cops, clean up shit and clean up vomit, yet none of these events were related. The worst part is, I work as a lifeguard and none of this is in the job description. FML I agree, your life sucks 1377 You deserved it 108 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By xacked - United States Today, I was designing a newspaper page with a story about an aggressive female bird that was defending its nest and attacking students near some stairs. In the article were photos of victims who were attacked. We had a good laugh over it. Later, I was walking there and the bird attacked me. FML I agree, your life sucks 12391 You deserved it 61518 172 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Kev - Canada Today, I walked home from work when a woman asked me to come inside for a free meal. It was at a homeless shelter. FML I agree, your life sucks 40130 You deserved it 5171 31 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ugh thanks - United States - Dayton Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML I agree, your life sucks 46406 You deserved it 6710 109 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML I agree, your life sucks 31467 You deserved it 2932 133 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Nick Nameous - United States Today, I celebrated the new year. Alone. FML I agree, your life sucks 24155 You deserved it 5261 52 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Davros | 12 #7699083 - Tuesday 25 September 2018 21:47 Gooood puppy, niiiice puppy, ok fetch.......please. Send a private message 4 0 Reply
By real life problems | 26 #7699202 - Wednesday 26 September 2018 0:48 I was hoping to see her lose part of her arm Send a private message 2 0 Reply
By Davros | 12 #7699083 - Tuesday 25 September 2018 21:47 Gooood puppy, niiiice puppy, ok fetch.......please. Send a private message 4 0 Reply
By mike3775 | 32 #7699108 - Tuesday 25 September 2018 22:26 Stupid is as stupid does Send a private message 1 0 Reply
By lkb307 | 21 #7699195 - Wednesday 26 September 2018 0:22 HERE'S YOUR SIGN!! Send a private message 0 0 Reply
By real life problems | 26 #7699202 - Wednesday 26 September 2018 0:48 I was hoping to see her lose part of her arm Send a private message 2 0 Reply
By DraganTine | 3 #7699220 - Wednesday 26 September 2018 2:42 nope not a shark.... its a tarpon Send a private message 0 1 Reply
By Devnath Rai | 3 #7699253 - Wednesday 26 September 2018 6:25 to fix r Send a private message 0 1 Reply
By wanted_2_want | 40 #7699258 - Wednesday 26 September 2018 6:47 At least she wasn’t that dumb and tried swimming with the ‘lovely pets’ to recoup her phone Send a private message 1 0 Reply
Today, my best friend confided in me that she's going to have sex with her cousin. Shocked, I tried to convince her not to and how it's a horrible idea.... I agree, your life sucks 795 You deserved it 116 8 Comments
Today, my ex-girlfriend called me say she needed her car repaired. I fixed it as fast as I could so she could get back on her way, only to find out she’s... I agree, your life sucks 519 You deserved it 412 6 Comments