Intimacy, Sex, Relatable and Awkward: Red flag

Red flag

By Hassan_been_laid - 16/11/2022 16:00 - United States

Today, things have gotten so bad with my wife that we both used the smell and sound of outside traffic as an excuse to not have anniversary sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 974

You deserved it 347

Intimacy Sex Relatable Awkward

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Still funny though

By Jeff - 29/04/2022 02:00

Today, my wife and I were getting intimate with for the first time in a while, as I haven't been home, when the foul stench of our dog's fart made us gag. Mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 197

By Sapphire Mills - 28/11/2018 13:30

Today, it's my 2-year wedding anniversary. It also marks 2 years since my wife told me, "We're married now we don't need to have sex anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 538

You deserved it 565

By Anonymous - 27/07/2016 20:32

Today, when the power went out, my wife said it was too bad we couldn't have sex by candlelight since she had just started her period. The only time she brings up sex is when we can't do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 540

You deserved it 1 717

By ._. - 05/06/2013 00:08 - United Kingdom - Letchworth

Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 766

You deserved it 8 855

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 05:18 - United States - Seattle

Today, my wife told me she'd rather bust up concrete than get it on with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 775

You deserved it 3 936

Access denied

By Anonymous - 26/09/2023 19:00 - United Kingdom - Barnsley

Today, my wife spent all day texting me dirty things so I used some of my holiday hours to come home 3 hours early for some sexy time. During my drive home she got in a bad mood, and no longer wanted sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 98

Get out of the garage

By lq87 - 09/08/2023 01:00 - United States - Lebanon

Today, I realized my fiance would rather sit in the garage and get high than spend any time with me. I can't remember the last time we had sex and I don't know what to do at this point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 121

Love is…

By Anonymous - 06/06/2023 18:00

Today, my wife has been angry since she walked in on me masturbating. In our hotel room. In NYC. That I booked for our anniversary. That she doesn’t want to leave. Or have sex in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 089

You deserved it 276

By Anonymous - 15/06/2014 19:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 063

You deserved it 6 377

By heart broken - 29/12/2013 09:05 - United States

Today, my husband told me yet again that the last two years have been the worst of his life. Our two year anniversary is next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 620

You deserved it 4 763

Anderling 32

Wednesday 16 November 2022 23:23

Dude, just break up at this point. Why be miserable together when you can be okay apart?

carmo21449 8

Friday 18 November 2022 5:33

divorce good lord

Comments

Anderling 32

Wednesday 16 November 2022 23:23

Dude, just break up at this point. Why be miserable together when you can be okay apart?

mha8649 8

Thursday 17 November 2022 4:56

it's cheaper to keep her.

carmo21449 8

Friday 18 November 2022 5:33

divorce good lord

Keywords

Underwear Sex Intimacy Weird First Dates Love Awkward LGBTQIA+ AITA Relatable Parenting Kids Health Poopoo peepee Gross DIY Money Ableism Work Religion Revenge Abuse Argument Therapist Coffee Harassment Skincare Embarrassing Parents Family

The Top

Today, my mother told me she thinks it is time for me to move into my own place. I agreed with her and went to look at studios/flats online. She later came into my room, saw me looking at places and then got pissed off at me, saying that I hate her for wanting to leave her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 251

You deserved it 692

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 409

You deserved it 6 176

The Top

Today, I stepped out of a bar in order to make a phone call. While I was outside, the bouncers arrived and ropes were put up. They wouldn't let me back in, claiming I was too young and they hadn't seen me come out. I was celebrating my 26th birthday, the legal drinking age is 18. I also have a beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 188

You deserved it 3 194

Today, my boyfriend told me I’m clearly turning into my mother. I turned round to have a go at him when I stopped, thought about it, and realised he’s completely right. I’m just like her. Now I’m so depressed, I don’t know if I want booze, a relaxing bath, or a really long, ugly crying session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 680

You deserved it 442

Today, I confessed to my husband that I quoted Lightning McQueen in an interview and got my dream job because of it. He wont stop laughing and telling my friends. I'm never going to live this down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 104

You deserved it 736

Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 175

You deserved it 4 266

Today, I went to Wal-Mart with my mom. She kept telling me to put my keys away so I wouldn't lose them. After a few times, I got annoyed and yelled at her. When we got back to her house, I realized I'd lost my keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 571

You deserved it 2 988

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 556

You deserved it 4 547