Today, at work, a customer threatened to punch me in the face because the store I work at doesn't have shopping baskets, only carts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at work, stocking shelves. A customer got mad because I was in the way of her "shopping time" and knocked down all the work I had done. FML
Today, my boss sent me home from work because she saw me not checking under my customer's cart to see if they had any hidden groceries. I didn't check because the customer threatened to "kick my ass" if I "accused him of stealing" by checking. FML
Today, as I was working in retail, this guy shoved me into the shelves for asking if he needed help with anything, screaming at me that I need to leave him alone. FML
Today, at work, I had a customer accuse me of taking the giftcard I had issued her for her return, after spending 15 minutes trying to fix her screwed up transaction. She began to yell, and follow me around the store. Security had to intervene and I had to be locked in an office until she left. FML
Today, a customer left their shopping cart behind their car and backed into it. She then came inside and threatened to sue me personally for not sending someone to collect it from where she left it. After 5 minutes of her yelling, I finally got a word in edgeways: I don't work there. FML
Today, a customer yelled at me because we didn't have any laptops in stock. I work at a clothing store. FML
Today, at work, a customer asked for my number. When I declined, he made a huge scene, shouting and scaring other customers. He tipped me seven cents. FML
Today, I got yelled at for providing horrible customer service, in a store I don't even work for. FML
Today, a man tried to rob the store I work at. Before the guy was taken by the cops, he complained to my manager for "unfriendly behavior". He took it seriously and bitched me out for not providing "quality service" to our customers. FML
Today, I was yelled at by a customer because we didn't have any ketchup packets. I work in a coffee shop. FML
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Top comments
fmessiah 19
Should've knocked off work, jumped into your car and followed him home. Three weeks later sneak into his house during the dark, chilly hours of the morning. Put your handkerchief (dribbled with chloroform) over his mouth and nose to ensure he doesn't wake up. Tie his arms and legs to the bed. Strip him naked. Install a mirror over the bed. Cover his body with fake blood (1 part water, 3 parts corn syrup and food dye). Now the tricky bit. Take his nob and tuck it in under his arse and tape it up tightly(he is knocked out he won't wake and make sure you hide the tape with the fake blood). Install a tiny remote sending camera that will send his awakening to your phone, make sure it is very well hidden. Now sneak out of the house. If all has gone to plan, when he wakes up his nob will have pins and needles and feel completely not normal. As he opens his eyes and groggily looks he will see himself covered in blood. With the extremely weird feeling down below his eyes will immediately search the mirror for that area and find his penis missing, the area covered in blood and his arse will hurt (the tape pulling at his arse hairs). Enjoy the horror you have created and laugh quietly to yourself as you drive away to his screams for help.
n3rdzgotskillz 29
Someone spat on my face once because the shop I work at only has shopping baskets, no carts. Maybe we should trade customers. ..Somehow. :)
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Comments (119)
loller27 6
someone's drunk
upyourzlolz 11
He's not drunk. He's just a "Basket Case".
MustangGirl72 9
He needs some serious anger management.
fmessiah 19
Should've knocked off work, jumped into your car and followed him home. Three weeks later sneak into his house during the dark, chilly hours of the morning. Put your handkerchief (dribbled with chloroform) over his mouth and nose to ensure he doesn't wake up. Tie his arms and legs to the bed. Strip him naked. Install a mirror over the bed. Cover his body with fake blood (1 part water, 3 parts corn syrup and food dye). Now the tricky bit. Take his nob and tuck it in under his arse and tape it up tightly(he is knocked out he won't wake and make sure you hide the tape with the fake blood). Install a tiny remote sending camera that will send his awakening to your phone, make sure it is very well hidden. Now sneak out of the house. If all has gone to plan, when he wakes up his nob will have pins and needles and feel completely not normal. As he opens his eyes and groggily looks he will see himself covered in blood. With the extremely weird feeling down below his eyes will immediately search the mirror for that area and find his penis missing, the area covered in blood and his arse will hurt (the tape pulling at his arse hairs). Enjoy the horror you have created and laugh quietly to yourself as you drive away to his screams for help.
MustangGirl72 9
That is horribly disturbing yet brilliant. You, sir, need help.
shoopd 19
Goddamn. Son, you are truly ****** in the head. Have you taken your medication today?
fmessiah 19
Destroying a person inside from an illusion is much more rewarding than physically harming someone. Your body will heal or learn to adjust, your brain and soul are much slower to find peace.
dalla25 6
only in america...
fmessiah 19
I have lived in many countries but have never visited America Dalla25. I walk the same dusty roads that you do. South of the river in the South Eastern part of the Sunshine State.
RobDawgz 7
Is it just me, god I hope not.
mom2pen 4
WTF??
cc_the_beast 6
Ah, a Queenslander, should have known...
fmessiah 19
Terribly sorry, in future I will endeavour to make sure my comments are more iPhone friendly. However in the spirit of fair play I would request that sometime in the near future you equip yourself with a device more capable of displaying the content you wish to access.
Clamcreepy 7
If I didn't know any better I would think you were jigsaw(Saw series) brother little brother seesaw. this was epic! Grade A+. Lmfao
Awsumuzzie 12
I can't believe this is where I'd meet my idol! Did you have this much fun writing saw, too?!
CryMoreFMLs 15
For iphone users, just find the middle and swipe a finger across, then you can thumb him up. Enjoy :)
tennis06 7
that's hilarious
topie_fml 6
First off Jesus Christ this is a great read. It reminded me of Law Abiding Citizen. All and all I feel sorry for any hookers that you happen across.
duckdragon31 0
You sound like you've done this before...
kevinbrouck 0
Hahahaha good one
saIty 17
Well that person has probably never experienced zooming across the aisles with a cart. He's probably really missing out then.
that1skaterxX 0
Sound kinda like Charlie sheen
Wangan_Warrior 9
I got fired from a my job at the supermarket for getting annoyed at idiots like this and bitching one out -_- I hate people
dalla25 6
...
Yak99 0
SAY SOMETHING!
Melonparty 0
Someone threatened to punch one of my work colleagues if their Danish was not fresh in two days time -_-
Pelreskovich 11
Let em throw the first punch, and get em back with a strong uppercut. Bitch won't complain about there being no baskets ever again.
Boston_4_Life 3
Thats so stupid!