Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got up at 5 am to bake a surprise birthday cake for my 16-year-old son. I put the cake on the table and went to call my son. "Surprise!" When I came back 30 seconds later, the cake was all gone and the dog was licking his lips. My son won't even believe I made a cake. FML
Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML
Today, it was my mother's birthday. My 5 year old brother and 85 year old grandma decided to decorate the house with balloons and a blow up "people" they found in my room. FML
Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML
Today, it was my friend's birthday, so I baked him a cake complete with his name written on it in homemade frosting. After I gave it to him, his mother berated me for it, saying I should have checked with her first before making a cake for her son. He's 28. FML
Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML
Today, I made a very pretty sunflower cake that I woke up incredibly early to make. It took me hours and a lot of money. It was for my grandparents anniversary and my whole family was invited. We only got to see the remains because the waiter gave it to the wrong family, and they ate it. FML
Today, I was having my birthday party. My dad showed up late, blind drunk, and drove his car straight through my garage door. FML
Today, a coworker left a chocolate cake on the "free food" table in the office. I had a slice. She's just called to ask if she left her grandmother's birthday cake at work. She made it from scratch. Now I'm baking a new cake in the office kitchen. FML
Today, I was at my sixteenth birthday party. My guests consisted of my grandma who I live with, and my 2-year-old cousin she was babysitting. FML
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Top comments
abbyycarper 13
Well you at least got ham
Crazafon 19
She obviously isn't a baker, but she sure is baked!
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Comments (82)
Turtle_rebellion 10
I'll take ham over cake any day!
Olympiakos10 15
Bake me a cake as fast as you can. If you are late you can come with ham.
ILoveMyArm 15
And we will eat it with the fam. Yep, that's the jam.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Damn, you guys are on a slam.
apache316 6
I know, Olympia commented quick like bam!
Wowxoxo 17
Your grandma listens to too much Kanye West, but she just wanted the party to go H.A.M
CorpsmanUp88 21
and the polish strikes back.
thatnucca 36
At least she wasn't dancing on the dinning table with her top off... But **** your sons life for seeing that though....
rocker_chick105 31
Benefits of ham: Protein, the kid won't go crazy after eating it, it's not as messy, bacon. And you're complaining?
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Well at least she brought candles
StraightEdge325 11
I love me some ham!
kelseythompson 27
To bad its not your birthday haha but ham is good, just not for a five year old when he expected a cake, to a five year old ham < cake ..
redbandit9877 12
It could be worse, she could have just brought the pig.
darkangel21492 10
I think the kids could have had fun with the pig.. not so much with ham...
queerdragon 20
There are a lot of things that could have gone wrong. 1. She could have burned down the house by lighting the candles. 2. She could have brought a pig and slaughtered it in front of all the children. 3. She could have gotten into a car accident and died, forever leaving little Billy to feel like her death was his fault. Plus, he is five, it will be very easy to make up the lack of cake to him.
DntLookBack 29
Was it cooked at least?