By FML Videos - United States - New York Going In Circles You spin me right round baby right round... 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By blindsparrow - United States - Dublin Today, I went out to get milk from the garage fridge for my mom. The moment I stepped out, my foot settled on the neighbor's boa, who likes to escape. After my mom finally opened the door to my frantic shouting, she spotted the snake, slammed the door, and locked both of us outside. FML I agree, your life sucks 36265 You deserved it 2924 73 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, I found out that my wife is pregnant again. During her last two pregnancies, she craved pop-tarts and screamed bloody murder at the drop of a hat, so I went out and bought a box for her. Turns out that this time, pop-tarts make her want to puke. Cue screaming. FML I agree, your life sucks 36011 You deserved it 4496 282 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By soooyeah - United States Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML I agree, your life sucks 112733 You deserved it 18490 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Raprotcommander - United States Today, I used my AA handbook as a beer coaster. FML I agree, your life sucks 12257 You deserved it 54199 232 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Arcam89 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh Today, I'm a car salesman. I got told to cold call a list of previous customers, but I recognised the names as I phoned them all last week; I told the manager this. He slammed his fist on my desk and told me to stop lying and do as I was told. I got told to "fuck off" 27 times. FML I agree, your life sucks 18515 You deserved it 1343 44 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Switzerland Today, I found out I'm allergic to the pills my doctor prescribed for coughing, which I really need because I ripped a muscle in my stomach. Now my whole upper body is covered in a terrible itchy rash. I also found out it will last for at least another week. FML I agree, your life sucks 29885 You deserved it 2572 319 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Lola987 Today, on my birthday, I tried to be a good girlfriend by making sure my boyfriend of 3 years alarms were set for work on his phone. Noticed he’s back to talking to his ex as the messenger bubble had her face in it.. He was asking for boob pictures...FML I agree, your life sucks 2592 You deserved it 277 19 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By blackedout - Singapore Today, I fainted on the sidewalk. When I woke up, I was still lying on the sidewalk, people were stepping over me and my purse was gone. FML I agree, your life sucks 63147 You deserved it 3780 116 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By LoveGlove - Canada - Calgary Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML I agree, your life sucks 47868 You deserved it 4914 96 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By 1415926 - United States Today, I got a large envelope from a college I applied to earlier. My mom, expecting big news, made my family gather round as I opened it. It ended up being a letter of rejection from not just that school, but all 3 campuses of the state college. FML I agree, your life sucks 34150 You deserved it 2746 48 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By runner - United States Run run run Today, I went for a run in a new pair of shoes that left me with huge blisters. As I finished cleaning them up so they could heal, I limped to my bed to take a nap. I was woken by the fire alarm. My building was having a drill and we couldn't use the elevators. I live on the 9th floor. FML I agree, your life sucks 31892 You deserved it 3748 38 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, in the middle of class, I sneezed out the biggest, wettest booger I have ever seen in my life. I'd used the inside of my elbow to cover my nose, but I neglected to notice that my hair had fallen over my shoulder. I couldn't get it all out of my hair and I don't think any believed me when I said it was hair gel. FML I agree, your life sucks 28083 You deserved it 5938 141 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 31/8/2020 06:55 - United Kingdom I need it Today, my husband and I have such busy careers, we have to schedule sex for when we’re both at home and hopefully not too tired, otherwise we’d never have sex at all. The last time we had sex was on my birthday, in April, and our next appointment is mid September. I really miss sex. FML I agree, your life sucks 1641 You deserved it 519 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ashlyn - United States Today, I went to pick up some of my clothes from my boyfriend's apartment. While searching under his bed he pulled out a tank top and bra and asked if they were mine. They weren't. FML I agree, your life sucks 36338 You deserved it 3116 121 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Gadsden Today, I accidentally Googled "best types of incest" instead of "best types of incense" on the family computer. The parental controls went nuts. I'm now grounded, and my parents are convinced I need psychiatric help. FML I agree, your life sucks 27499 You deserved it 2773 71 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Need To Bathe In Deodorant - United Kingdom - Egham Today, it's so insanely hot that no matter how often I shower or use deodorant the smell of my armpits makes me feel physically sick. FML I agree, your life sucks 10769 You deserved it 1030 56 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Houston Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML I agree, your life sucks 26201 You deserved it 2739 119 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Southwold Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML I agree, your life sucks 31289 You deserved it 2513 166 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By SlowPacker - United States - Minneapolis Today, my family informed me that we were going on a 10 hour road trip to my cousin's wedding. They only decided to tell me 45 minutes before we left for said road trip. FML I agree, your life sucks 19676 You deserved it 1448 48 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By horsefuck - Malaysia - Kuala Lumpur Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend, when I noticed a large piece of broccoli wedged between her teeth. I have no idea how she didn't feel it, but I couldn't stop fixating on it and started going soft. I had to cry out, fake an orgasm, then toss the condom really quickly to spare her feelings. FML I agree, your life sucks 27400 You deserved it 6821 84 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By _dopey_ - United Kingdom Today, I spilt boiling tea all over my stomach and left leg, so I went to the hospital to get it checked out. They said I wouldn't be able to expose it to the sun for the next two months. I'm going to Barbados tomorrow. FML I agree, your life sucks 63886 You deserved it 7788 129 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Monaco Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm "high maintenance." I'd only asked him to use deodorant and brush his teeth. He hasn't had a shower in over a week. FML I agree, your life sucks 35108 You deserved it 6059 172 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fuckendog - Australia - Virginia Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling. I thought this was funny and I teased her a bit. I then slipped in the drool as I was carrying the bacon and she got to enjoy it. FML I agree, your life sucks 21203 You deserved it 55567 97 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Happy 20th! - United States Today, it's my 20th birthday! Happy birthday to me! My boyfriend threw a beer can through my back wind-shield after breaking up with me. FML I agree, your life sucks 38693 You deserved it 4574 233 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Stevenston Today, the guy I like and his friend came home with me to work on a project. I opened my front door and my mum was at the top of the stairs completely naked, bent over, drying her hair with the hairdryer. It took a few moments for her to realise we were there. FML I agree, your life sucks 36135 You deserved it 3069 90 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By j0natron - United States Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML I agree, your life sucks 8279 You deserved it 54306 46 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ahappypenguin Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML I agree, your life sucks 34890 You deserved it 2014 121 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By paul - France Today, I had a big meeting. Half way through my presentation, I sneezed, and continued talking. I get some weird looks from my co-worker but I didn't understand what he meant. When I finished, I passed by my boss walking to my chair, he gave me a handkerchief. Why? Snot was all over my tie. FML I agree, your life sucks 26165 You deserved it 4730 65 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Man Shamed - United States - Hyattsville Today, while using the bathroom in a small coffee shop, I somehow passed out sitting on the toilet. There is nothing more jarring than waking up to the vicious banging of 7 angry, urine-filled patrons attempting to break down a door. FML I agree, your life sucks 5351 You deserved it 1058 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ShouldHaveDoneItMyself - Sudan Today, I didn't have the courage to tell the guy who likes me that I only thought of him as a friend, so I asked my best friend to do it for me. It turns out that her way of doing this is telling him to "fuck off" and then punching him in the face. FML I agree, your life sucks 9075 You deserved it 12243 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Nator - United States Today, this guy took me to Denny's on a first date and used a 2 for 1 coupon. It was expired. I paid. FML I agree, your life sucks 46061 You deserved it 5110 52 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and explaining to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML I agree, your life sucks 58466 You deserved it 7572 185 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 19/6/2020 23:55 Hot hot hot Today, my AC stopped working and I have no money. I live in Phoenix, Arizona. FML I agree, your life sucks 1430 You deserved it 136 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By tammylauraine - United States Today, after handing out several résumés for several jobs, I realized that I forgot to add my phone number to them. FML I agree, your life sucks 11168 You deserved it 31796 107 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Bakersfield Today, I was searched and questioned at the airport for having an apple. FML I agree, your life sucks 42853 You deserved it 4762 188 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 19/12/2020 13:02 - United Kingdom - Boston Affection breakdown Today, my wife can't be bothered to do anything that isn't work, talk about her work, and sit on the sofa. Then she complains that I don't show any affection, when she can be bothered to even talk to me. FML I agree, your life sucks 726 You deserved it 104 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By cumbucket cops - United States - Barberton Today, I found out that my unemployed husband has his own web-comic, that he makes money off it, and that it mainly involves the main character's airhead, money-grubbing wife ruining his life. She looks strikingly like me and shares my name. FML I agree, your life sucks 44439 You deserved it 7042 89 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Houston Today, I found out my brand new $3,000 mattress that is supposed to relieve my back pain works amazingly. I only discovered this because my wife, son, daughter, dog, and two cats are all asleep on it and not waking up. FML I agree, your life sucks 11752 You deserved it 1006 35 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By myrkes - Switzerland - Marstetten Today, it's the day before my friends' wedding. My dress has not yet been shipped from the online shop where I ordered it three weeks ago, the hand-crafted gift that was ordered last month is trapped at customs and my cats have just managed to open the drawer and eat the wedding card. FML I agree, your life sucks 28041 You deserved it 3006 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By RecentCollegeGrad Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML I agree, your life sucks 34008 You deserved it 9747 187 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By real life problems | 26 #7704516 - Saturday 6 October 2018 2:41 3rd world problems Send a private message 6 0 Reply
By melisssa87 | 30 #7704492 - Saturday 6 October 2018 0:59 Hope he didn’t have a full tank Send a private message 2 0 Reply
By melisssa87 | 30 #7704492 - Saturday 6 October 2018 0:59 Hope he didn’t have a full tank Send a private message 2 0 Reply
By Tiffany Hash | 3 #7704503 - Saturday 6 October 2018 1:49 hhh go out cxhy6 ok up l so in case z ok just gdzselnnnñj hi Send a private message 0 5 Reply
Reply adelaine782002 | 17 #7704538 - Saturday 6 October 2018 5:24 wtf!? I had a stroke while trying to make sense reading that! Send a private message 1 0 Reply
By real life problems | 26 #7704516 - Saturday 6 October 2018 2:41 3rd world problems Send a private message 6 0 Reply
Today, I caught up with a good friend and he let me rant about my sexless marriage. He was really understanding and supportive. I got home and he sent... I agree, your life sucks 327 You deserved it 59 2 Comments
Today, I had the house to myself for the morning. I decided to enjoy being alone, so pulled my trusty bullet vibrator from the drawer. I was very much... I agree, your life sucks 757 You deserved it 163 7 Comments