GET UP

By hottygirl905 - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, I found out I have a kidney infection. Now I'm forced to drink at least 4 glasses of water before going to bed. I also have to be woken up every two hours to be told to, "GO PEE BEFORE YOU DIE!" by my mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 792
You deserved it 2 342
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Top comments

ambowew 7

Well, what are you waiting for? GO PEE BEFORE YOU DIE!

371 5
qwaszxwesdxc 0

Water you waiting for? Pee what I did there? But I'm not just kidneying around.

94 5

Comments

Michael_92 20

Look at the bright side, least she cares. Who would do the dishes if you were gone?

24 2
Spectre529 12

Your mom has a good sense of humor for a time such as this....

9 5
HeroOfHyrule 0

If you hold in your pee for over two hours, your head will blow off and you will be tortured forever by the pee demon forever, scientists say. NOW GO PEE BEFORE YOU DIE!

13 3
whattheforkdude 0

At least you can go to the bathroom at night.

3 4
perdix 29

I love that your name is "hotty girl." I can imagine being the lucky stud you pick up in a bar, and you take home for a night of mad, passionate sex, interrupted every two hours with your mom bursting in and bellowing, "Go pee before you die," like Mrs. Wolowitz. Hot, indeed ;)

43 2
br0ccoli 14

Thought I was the only one who noticed. Her name makes me think she got that kidney infection from an unchecked UTI. Lots of sex, right hotty?

13 2
perdix 29

Ah, yes, when hotty urination reminds you of the hot, unprotected sex you had with a sketchy girl you just met. The gift that keeps on giving, until antibiotics takes it away.

13 1
jizzwold 21

Or until it recedes and waits for another chance to flare up

0 2
cr3ativity 15

Anyone else think of SouthPark's "Vote or Die, muthaf*ckr, Vote or Die" music video, after reading this FML?

5 4
THE_A_TEEN 27

No. But the question is, did you vote on this FML? If you didn't, pray that Sirin doesn't find you. Vote or die, ************.

10 0
br0ccoli 14

OR you can wear adult diapers to bed and just pee when you hear the alarm on your phone right where you are. I love efficiency.

6 1
ClosetTroll 10

Just make sure you go to the toilet every time and not the sink, jugs, fishbowl etc. etc.

8 1
llamafish 25

If you can't make it to the bathroom you could always go in the closet, though.

0 0
Theia_fml 0

Your sweet mother cares. You did pee, right?

0 2
KiddNYC1O 20

One way or the other, yes.

0 0