Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark, only to discover it was poop. After further investigation, I found out my younger sister had been wearing them and "experimenting". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after I took a shower, I was wiping my face with the towel I share with my sister. It smelled peculiar, so I took my face away and looked at it. Turns out, I was wiping my face on a huge shit stain. FML
Today, my little sister took a dump in our bath tub right before we were leaving for soccer practice. When my mom found it, she blamed it on me, then made me pick it up with my bare hands. FML
Today, I went to take a shower. I noticed a funky smell, but I just assumed it was from whoever had been there last. When I pulled the shower curtain back, I found out that my sister has stopped using feminine hygiene products for her period. It looked like someone had died in the bathtub. FML
Today, I grabbed a fresh hand towel from the drawer in the bathroom. I wiped my hands and noticed they smelled like shit. My 6-year-old had wiped poo from his finger onto the dark grey towels. I guess he sometimes helps the poo out. Good to know. FML
Today, I spilled loose face powder on myself while applying my make-up. My sister subsequently walked in on me vacuuming my crotch. FML
Today, I went into my parents room to empty their wastebasket. Next to it and around their bed, I found tissues that were soaked in an unknown sticky substance. I had to pick them up. FML
Today, I pulled a white cloth with string on the end from my dog's mouth. I then realized I was holding my sister's used tampon. FML
Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML
Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML
Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Welshite 40
Nah, she wasn't experimenting. Do you realize how hard it is to exfoliate your anus without proper exfoliating gloves? It's difficult. Pro-tip: Never use steel-wool.
kellyem2 20
At least you discovered this before you put them on your face, right?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (64)
Witchylady 18
Firstly who would you sniff the gloves and your sister is just gross for not cleaning the gloves.
lindora 35
how the hell do you even come up with this
Dkman 11
How does that even come about? Well. Factors here OP. your age. Her age. If she's a young kid, well. Then she was curious. In a gross way. If she's around 14(puberty and hormones n bla bla bla) perhaps talk to her, as awkward as that sounds, and buy a new pair of gloves.
gbrodee1 5
I guess you could say( puts on sunglasses)you got shit-faced
martin8337 36
Talk about nearly getting shitfaced.
paramor3 23
That's a shittastic disaster....is nothing safe?!
ethanboen 6
I hope you didn't keep using them Dx
girlmechanic200 0
At least you didn't actually use them
aeldredge70 7
gross
mchmelev1993 10
-throws up after post- D: whats happened to humanity these days