By thesparrow - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States
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wow...Im not religious at all, but I really dont think she could be that crazy, she is probably just using her religion as an excuse to stop dating you. Did her parents like you? Maybe they told her that wasnt what god wanted. Either way, you could do a lot better. Either shes crazy or she is using her religion as an excuse, which isn't good either way.
You'd be surprised just how crazy people are when they invoke their religion as a means for living their life instead of guiding it. My GF of 5 years told me she wants to marry me, but God won't allow it because I'm not a virgin like she. I don't even know where people get this from the Bible, I've read it, God never says that... You're better off with someone who won't play games with your head.
tell her God thinks that you are the chosen one, and he chose you to give her a message from him that He doesn't like the way she is using His word to control her life. Tell her that He says He wants her to accept the love that the two of you have, and that you belong together, and that if she tries to stay apart from you, (His Chosen One) then she will burn in hell for her sin of disobeying His word. :D she'll probably fall for it. God is her shepherd. then, after that... you dump her. fuck with that dumb sheep's head.