All over the place

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was pulled over and administered a sobriety test due to an officer's suspicion that I was driving under the influence. I was completely sober, and, apparently, I suck at driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 392
You deserved it 12 108

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Top comments

saIty 17

Officer, I swear to drunk I'm not God.

Take driving lessons


kathryn14 19

This is not an fml

Well, it's up here isn't it?

I really want to know what she said now.

62 - I second that.

kathryn14 19

I just said it wasn't really an fml.. Haha I just thought it was lame. My bad I guess.

Well, apparently if you comment about wanting to see what a moderated comment says, your comment gets deleted. Anyone else think that the FML staff are secretly evil overlords, who want us to think that there's nothing wrong when in reality there's everything wrong?

Do like they did in Bridesmaids!

I don't think it's ever good advice to tell someone to follow something that they did in that movie...

RpiesSPIES 27

Someone actually watched that movie?...

Never heard of it.

I liked what they did in Tommy Boy.


Tommy boy is a fking awesome movie. Just sayin.

Suck it up.

Exactly. There are people who have bigger problems than simply "bad driving." Besides, practice makes perfect.

Take driving lessons

I have a feeling it's an asian woman.... Nothing will help :p

Yeah, I don't feel safe on the road with people who drive like they are drunk. OP needs some lessons.

Could have been worse.. You could have been clumsy to where you failed the test...

Maybe it's just me, but I personally would rather fail the driving test and practice more... Rather than passing the test, get my confidence built up, then get pulled over only to be told I drive like someone drunk O.o

I meant the field sobriety test.. The whole walking the line and chiz..

Well nowadays there's the breathalyzer, and that's pretty damn hard to fail while sober.

Still works here and I doubt that it's impossible to fail while sober..

There's a few ways you can fail sober, for example alcohol based mouthwash. Another common example is somebody drinking one beer, which would normally be the legal limit, and then breathalyzing quickly after drinking said beer. Especially because limits are getting so low.

At least you didn't get a ticket?

Maybe they got a ticket for reckless driving.

that's why i put the question mark

I feel your pain OP me too it's k we can take cabs together!

Noor, #8 was completely sober, apparently he sucks at typing ...

hey now I was only slightly hungover.

I can't be the only one wishing he made his name Spongebob, can I?

Damn it. Now that you said it, I'm thinking it to.. D:

14- I'm not usually that asshole grammar nazi, but seriously, adding an extra "o" to "to" is not that hard. Thanks.

Look at the bright side OP! You aren't in trouble for drunk driving.

estes816 9

I hope you wear your seatbelt then!