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Recentlydeleted's favorite FMLs

New face

By Anonymous - 02/11/2010 14:20 - United States

Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say, "Hello, my name is…" I sneezed right in her face. FML

agreeclassic 26 905

vote type 1 6 457

By scratchpost - 28/10/2010 12:07 - United States

Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML

agreeclassic 32 943

vote type 1 4 627

By Anonymous - 21/10/2010 08:21 - United States

Today, after soccer practice I was looking for my dad. Last night he was an hour late, so I was pretty pissed. When I spotted him, I saw him flirting with a much younger woman. I then tried throwing my soccer ball to his feet, but ended up slamming his head. Only to find out he wasn't my dad. FML

agreeclassic 10 790

vote type 1 38 638

By monogamous - 28/10/2010 09:26 - Australia

Today, I met my husband's other wife. FML

agreeclassic 61 476

vote type 1 4 809

By Anonymous - 23/10/2010 16:01 - United States

Today, my parents told me about how they met. I'd already known they were eight years apart, but I never knew my dad started dating my mom when he was 21 and she was 13. FML

agreeclassic 57 722

vote type 1 4 116