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Miscommunication

By Leighton on C - 03/03/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was texting my crush and I wanted to send him a cute emoji to show I was thinking of him. Instead of sending the "heart eyes" emoji, I hit the "poop" emoji. The worst part? He responded with, "Yeah, I'm a piece of shit, thanks for reminding me." FML

agreeclassic 164

vote type 1 381

Hash it out

By Anonymous - 10/03/2025 16:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I walked out of our house. My wife suddenly became quiet again because she was mad at me for an unknown reason. It's always like this, and it annoys me every time. She has too much pride and doesn't want to talk things out. I feel so sad, especially since we have a five-month-old baby. I want to break up. FML

agreeclassic 513

vote type 1 151

Mystery

By Gary - 14/03/2025 14:00 - United Kingdom - Wallsend

Today, I was pulled into an office by the head of my college department. I was told that I was “making someone uncomfortable” but refused to elaborate on who it was, or what I’d done wrong. How am I supposed to fix a problem if I don’t know what the problem is? FML

agreeclassic 556

vote type 1 92

Waste of time

By Anonymous - 23/03/2025 06:00 - United States - Belton

Today, the lab wouldn't let me do my pre-employment drug test because they had no time when I had to pee really bad. They signed me in to do other blood work I needed, but when I asked to use the bathroom, they said it was for drug testing only. I peed myself in the lobby and couldn't do the blood test either. FML

agreeclassic 447

vote type 1 93

Eavesdropping ain't a good idea

By Sorry we can't all be 5'10", Katie - 26/03/2025 18:00 - United States

Today, I overheard my boyfriend's future sister-in-law ask him not to bring me to the wedding. Apparently, me being so much shorter than everyone else is "embarrassing" and "would make the pictures look weird." FML

agreeclassic 479

vote type 1 80

One-upped

By Anonymous - 28/03/2025 15:00 - Canada - King City

Today, I went out to see my uncle on my mom’s side and his family for my mom’s birthday. My oldest cousin insisted that he and his wife give their gift first. It was a stuffed bear, along with the news that they’re expecting their first kid, and making my mom a great-aunt. My gift was a cake she used to make. FML

agreeclassic 329

vote type 1 94

So, the thing is…

By Hailee - 30/03/2025 15:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I woke up to dozens of messages from friends and family, all asking about a video of me saying something awful. It wasn’t me. It was AI. But try explaining that to my grandma. FML

agreeclassic 420

vote type 1 76

Where is my mind?

By Anonymous - 01/04/2025 02:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, after softball practice, I could not find my car keys. Emptied my bag completely, no keys. Called a locksmith but he never showed up. Walked across the street to ask the fire department if they could help. After they got into my car, I found them. In my bag. Caught in my scorebook. The fireman just laughed. FML

agreeclassic 167

vote type 1 354

Bathroom breakdown

By Anonymous - 10/04/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I used the public restroom at a park. After washing my hands, I went to dry them, only to realize there were no paper towels. I thought the air dryer would work, but it broke halfway through, leaving me standing there, awkwardly fanning my hands with my arms spread wide. A group of teenagers walked in and started laughing at me. FML

agreeclassic 179

vote type 1 307

Winky

By XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX - 11/04/2025 21:00 - Romania

Today, I was going to have sex with a girl, but when I got my dick out she said, "You got a nice winky." Who the fuck calls a dick a winky unless they're in kindergarten? Felt like I brought home a toddler. FML

agreeclassic 294

vote type 1 188

RIP Buddy

By Anonymous - 22/04/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, I held my 14 year-old dog as he passed away. He made me a better person and I spent more time with him and loved him more than 99% of the population. I don't know how I'm going to do tomorrow when I dig his grave, and know he's not with me anymore. FML

agreeclassic 820

vote type 1 89

This is not a drill

By Anonymous - 26/04/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, my office building had a surprise fire drill. As I rushed to exit, I realized that I’d put on a shirt that was way too tight. It felt like it was practically cutting off my circulation, and I couldn’t breathe too well. I tried to suck in my stomach but almost passed out in the process. I spent the rest of the drill struggling with my shirt while people gave me weird looks. FML

agreeclassic 81

vote type 1 466

Making the scene

By billie - 29/04/2025 15:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I had my first day in an acting class. Our assignment was to perform a dramatic monologue. I got super into it, threw myself into character, and dramatically fell to my knees to deliver a line. Unfortunately, my knees slipped, and I faceplanted into the floor in front of the entire class. FML

agreeclassic 352

vote type 1 165

Close proximity

By Anonymous - 01/05/2025 09:00 - Germany - Jesteburg

Today, I am appalled that my neighbor was fired from his job. Not because I pity him, but because now he will not only light his stinking grill under my living room window every single night, but also play his radio outside all day long. Also right under my window. His garden is HUGE by the way. FML

agreeclassic 367

vote type 1 105

Freak out

By ??? - 03/05/2025 03:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I woke up from a nap to a weird buzzing sound in my ear. Panicked, I swatted at my ear to get rid of what I thought was a fly. Instead, I hit my phone, which was on vibrate, and it fell on the tiled floor, spinning the screen into a cracked, shattered mess. FML

agreeclassic 372

vote type 1 312

Flimsy excuse

By Anonymous - 04/05/2025 22:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, my fiancee broke up with me, all because I told her I couldn't install a home security system, fix a camera, and entertain her son in the hour before I went to work. FML

agreeclassic 566

vote type 1 83

A tad jealous

By Anonymous - 08/05/2025 18:00 - China - Changsha

Today, after my ex dumped me on November 18, 2024, after 11 years of friendship and just 6 months dating, spreading rumors and ruining my reputation, we’re now in the same class again. The worst part? She’s already chasing another motherfucker who looks like her old crush, right in front of me. Disgusting. FML

agreeclassic 390

vote type 1 227

Hobbit feet

By Anonymous - 11/05/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad has such thick, horn like toenails that when I stepped on one of the cuttings, it actually stabbed into the thinner skin on the underside of my toe and bled like crazy. FML

agreeclassic 450

vote type 1 73

The old you, the new me

By Sad and lonely - 13/05/2025 20:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, I spent the day with my ex-husband, getting our house ready for market. We've been doing this for weeks, and to my shock, my ex has turned back into the hard-working, handy, patient man I fell in love with. I don't know what to say or do, so I spend every day quietly heartsick with longing. FML

agreeclassic 416

vote type 1 295

Game on

By Anonymous - 15/05/2025 23:00 - Australia

Today, myself and three friends went to a games night and we had to come up with a team name. Since I’m black and they’re all white, they insisted on “Interracial”. FML

agreeclassic 504

vote type 1 103

Rough week

By Dee-Nice - 17/05/2025 03:00 - United States - Phoenix

Today, after I'd given myself a week off work for my birthday, and my alcoholic sister decided she needed to go to rehab, which then hijacked the whole week for her crisis, at 4:30 am, the morning I'm supposed to return to work, I end up in the ER with a first time kidney stone. The next thing I know, she's in the ER for an injury. FML

agreeclassic 490

vote type 1 76

Main character syndrome

By Ross - 21/05/2025 00:00 - Slovakia - Bratislava

Today, my friend told me to move on from having feelings for her, despite me accepting that we were only friends several months ago. FML

agreeclassic 326

vote type 1 161

Mean boy

By Anonymous - 22/05/2025 13:00 - United States - Steele

Today, ever since I had to rehome my cat because he was really mean, I've been wanting to get another one to replace him. I remembered a particular cat I found at the adoption center who seemed to like me a lot, and I decided I wanted to adopt her. When I got there, I found out she unexpectedly died yesterday. FML

agreeclassic 296

vote type 1 312

Rough evening for introverts

By Chris - 24/05/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, at a dinner party, I got locked in the host’s toilet because the doorknob broke. I had to text the host to rescue me. She opened the door… with 5 other guests standing behind her. My social battery was wiped out by the whole ordeal, so I immediately wanted to go home and hide, but instead I got drunk and passed out on her couch. FML

agreeclassic 180

vote type 1 454

You're not supposed to eat it

By Anonymous - 26/05/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I used sunscreen on my face. Said sunscreen was expired and I had an allergic reaction. FML

agreeclassic 353

vote type 1 125

Bloody Janet

By Not Janet - 28/05/2025 03:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was on a Zoom call with my mic muted. Or so I thought. After about a minute, I started ranting about how Janet always gets credit for my work. Janet was in the meeting. So was my boss. None of them was receptive to my criticism. FML

agreeclassic 101

vote type 1 619

Disappointment

By Anonymous - 29/05/2025 13:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, I feel like I’ve failed as a parent. My brilliant college-bound daughter is throwing her life and future away to play “step-mama” with her scummy dropout boyfriend. The loser is 17 with three kids but my daughter is absolutely smitten. Neither my husband nor I can make her change her mind. FML

agreeclassic 621

vote type 1 93

Heaven knows I'm miserable now

By Fat, hungry and tired - 02/06/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I suddenly became really hungry at 11pm. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but I have no snacks and everything is closed. Also, being hungry exacerbates my insomnia. Words cannot describe how miserable I am right now. FML

agreeclassic 354

vote type 1 154

Spoilsport

By Don't you have better things to do? - 06/06/2025 05:00 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I caught my boyfriend making my cat dance to Cotton Eye Joe. FML

agreeclassic 112

vote type 1 354

Am I the asshole?

By Anonymous - 09/06/2025 13:00 - Romania

Today, I stayed home from work to pick up my Switch 2. As I raced into the house and prepared for the magic of unboxing it, my wife called and ruined the moment by blathering about her boring day. FML

agreeclassic 117

vote type 1 1 130

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I can't any peace and quiet in any room of my flat. The neighbours on one side are arguing, the other side are having very loud sex, the ones upstairs I suspect are playing some sort of games console, and downstairs daughter has been practising her violin badly all morning. FML

agreeclassic 1 020

vote type 1 142

Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML

agreeclassic 26 891

vote type 1 4 617

Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a shoe to deal with it. Just as I jumped up to smush it, my idiot brother flicked the light off. I missed the spider, but it didn't miss my face as the impact caused it to fall. FML

agreeclassic 23 630

vote type 1 2 690

Today, I joined what I thought was my weekly team meeting on Zoom. I launched into a rant about our broken coffee machine, which I've been asking for weeks for it to be fixed, before someone interrupted with, “Erm, this is a parent-teacher conference.” I don’t even have kids. FML

agreeclassic 96

vote type 1 419

Today, my mother told me how long it took for her to have me. Not how long she carried me in her womb - how long it took her and my dad to have sex. FML

agreeclassic 34 070

vote type 1 3 043

Today, I got pushed around by several suspicious mothers in a playground. I just wanted to sit down and rest my feet while I waited for my wife to finish her shopping across the street. FML

agreeclassic 1 647

vote type 1 184