i think it depends on how he went about it that would make this so bad

I mean, I'm sorry for you and that sucks, but he is being mature in admitting he isn't ready and wants to continue the relationship without taking that step. Maybe give him time or ask him why he's scared now? Sorry

how'd he do it? I mean if he did it calmly and made it clear it was just he was unready he's not a bad person. Otherwise yeah probably not so good

Be glad he admitted he wasn't ready. This happens a lot when men feel pressured into getting married whether it's social, family, religious, or partners putting pressure on them.

I think the issue here is the bit about how he blames OP. That sounds like, to me, he at least partially tried to blame her for his unprepared state, and then blamed her for refusing to back step in relationship. There's also the fact that, since the real difference between fiancé and boyfriend may as well be that the first has a defined date at which one becomes a husband, it would have been better to simply cancel any planned dates and leave it alone until he was more comfortable. Wanting to take back the proposal basically may as well say that he doesn't see himself in a long term relationship with her, unless it is one that he can leave at random with fewer consequences. I'm extrapolating a bit here, but the wording points out some issues.

Be thankful u found out he has commitment issues now rather than finding out he cheated on you later on when ur married, but seriously sorry that bs happened OP

You obviously pushed him to get engaged..

That man is literal human garbage and he's probably abusing you. Dump his ass.