When dinner is late By Lewis - 27/01/2019 00:30 FEED ME NOW! I agree, your life sucks 358 You deserved it 119 Share Tweet Share
Today, I went to get my first acupuncture. The doctor was a cute Korean woman, so I tried to start a conversation. When she pricked me with a needle near the tailbone, I involuntarily let one loose and saw her gag. FML I agree, your life sucks 13 164 You deserved it 2 017
Today, I performed the Heimlich maneuver on a man. He cussed me out because the piece of food he was choking on was "a perfectly good portion of lobster". FML I agree, your life sucks 35 694 You deserved it 2 758
Today, I took a pregnancy test because I'd missed a few periods, gained weight, and been moody. Turns out I'm just fat and moody. FML I agree, your life sucks 50 616 You deserved it 11 673
Today, after my boyfriend broke up with me, the only thing positive about my day was a pregnancy test. FML I agree, your life sucks 41 925 You deserved it 6 995
Today, as I’m single, I got permission to bring a friend as my plus-one to my sister's wedding. He’s religious so I thought of all people he’d be one to behave. Nope. He got plastered on champagne, slapped the brides ass as she was walking down the aisle with our dad, then started a fight. FML I agree, your life sucks 538 You deserved it 122
Today, I feel like I’ve failed as a parent. My brilliant college-bound daughter is throwing her life and future away to play “step-mama” with her scummy dropout boyfriend. The loser is 17 with three kids but my daughter is absolutely smitten. Neither my husband nor I can make her change her mind. FML I agree, your life sucks 641 You deserved it 96
Make your own ******* dinner!!
😅