Intimacy: Today, I was at the bar and this guy came up to me. He then said...

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Ewwwwwww - 05/05/2016 00:10 - United States - Humble

Today, I was at the bar and this guy came up to me. He then said "hey, want me to do a magic trick?" then proceeded to collapse on the floor. I started to laugh, until another guy said "SOMEONE CALL 911". Turns out he had a heart attack FML.

I agree, your life sucks 62

You deserved it 10

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

Keywords

Love Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Sex Intimacy Revenge Food Work Awkward Parents Relatable Weird Miscellaneous Health Job interview Social Media Jealousy Facebook Relationship advice Kids AITA Annoying Roommate Shoes Music Names Customers Education Capitalism

The Top

Today, according to my husband of many years, he was actually planning to ghost me after our boring first date. It was only the fact that I shagged him senseless that night that kept him around long enough for us to actually get to know each other. Hooray for me being a "loose slut" back in 1998. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 138

You deserved it 560

Today, I was prepping for an interview after several months of unemployment. I had just finished brushing my teeth when I reached back and grabbed a towel behind me to wipe my face. Turns out it wasn't a towel, it was my newly dry-cleaned suit jacket that my wife had put there for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 831

You deserved it 10 516

The Top

Today, my step-dad explained to me why he doesn't need to wash his body. He condescendingly said, "Well when you shampoo your hair, the soap runs down your body and cleans everything." He's 37 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 762

You deserved it 2 922

Today, I was getting a haircut. During the haircut, the barber cut her hand. She hesitated for a minute then continued to run her hands through and cut my hair with her bloody fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 891

You deserved it 2 156

Today, I found out that my cat, that I've had for 3 years, is actually my neighbor's missing cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 511

You deserved it 6 879

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find a very gorgeous girl in my bed. Her only words to me were "did anything happen?" When I replied yes she began to cry. Nice to know I was someone's rock bottom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 599

You deserved it 5 613

Today, my family gathered to pray. It was my brother's turn to pray and he ended with this, "...and help Chev that he does not become the disappointment everyone expects him to be. Amen." I looked on in shock as my entire family nodded and said "Amen" in agreement. Hi, I'm Chev. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 709

You deserved it 5 184

Today, I tried to explain to my 23-year-old boyfriend the difference between "your" and "you're". I do this every other day, but it's like his head is permanently stuck in the first grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 139

You deserved it 6 909