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By sonofa... - 21/04/2016 18:08 - United States - Sorrento
Today, I caught my rod in my zipper so hard it needed to be cauterized. To make matters worse, my girlfriend and I just, with VERY pleasant results for both parties, lost out virginity to each other two days ago. Doctor days I can't, and I quote, "dingle my dangle" for at least 2 months. FML.