Her dad's feelings don't matter. As long as the husband isn't abusive, her dad should keep it to himself.

OP here. Apparently he thought that my husband and i won't last long because of our cultural differences and he was planning to scare him off by putting him through hell whenever we were visiting my parents. We live abroad so we don't visit our parents very often and when we went there the last time my father was indeed very harsh on him for absolutely no reason but we figured he acted like this just because he's going through a mid-life crisis and my marriage was an emotional shock for him. Two years ago he was still treating me as I was a child, dictating every move I made and me having to ask for permission to leave the house even if I'm an adult. Now, this is normally unacceptable in most places on Earth but my family is kind of conservative and very traditional and his behaviour is considered quite normal in eastern Europe (not acceptable in my opinion but I had absolutely no choice but accepting it). Finding out about his true intentions and his true feelings about my marriage and my husband is the most unexpected thing that ever happened to me because this, even in "our" culture is absolutely unacceptable.

I hope you remember saying stupid shit like this when you have kids.

I hope you remember saying stupid shit like this when you have kids.

OP here. My husband is the most empathetic and selfless person I ever met. Everybody likes him except for my dad who thinks that he (my husband) has hidden intentions and married me out of interest because "no one is THAT nice". He also hates the fact thay my husband is "a filthy pagan" with "no respect towards our culture" (because he didn't convert to my parent's religion).

He did. But at the time I thought this is how it is and this is how parents should treat their kids. It's only after I grew up that I realized that my dad messed up a big time and he still does...

Trying to socially isolate someone does not equal love. In fact, trying to socially isolate someone by sabotaging relationships is a form of abuse. If you think that someone you care about is dating something me you have VALID concerns about, like a drug addiction or a history of being a domestic abuser, you tell them up front. If you don't have a valid reason, you should either keep your mouth shut, or say it upfront and be prepared for them to (rightfully) be annoyed or even angry with you. Especially if you tell them because you expect them to drop their date mate just because you say so. Doing what sounds like it hints at months, if not years, of passive aggressive attempts to sabotage a loved one's relationship isn't love. It's saying that you think the person you are claiming to "love" is your property. Anyone who shows their "love" by being a controlling, trust betraying, selfish brat, needs professional help.

OP here. I couldn't agree more. In a way this is extremely hurtful because I didn't imagine that my own father will turn out to be this person, in another way I am now aware of what's going on and after weeks of therapy my psychiatrist said that the person who should go there is my father and not me. My father doesn't have any reason at all to hate my husband. My whole family adores him, they "adopted" him right away. I don't understand what's going on in my dad's head but I can only hope that he will stop this absurd behaviour someday.