Secret life

By FroggyGirl888 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my roommates thought I wasn't home and started talking about me. Apparently I'm a lesbian, devil worshiper, and an alcoholic. I didn't know my life was so fascinating. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 204
You deserved it 3 340

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Top comments

catharsis5 9

I love how you turned something negative into a positive

Very fascinating indeed!

Comments

Very fascinating indeed!

enonymous 8

I didn't know you were Tom Cruise?!?

Normally those three things don't all go together, but then again...

What got them to think that? I'm gonna take a guess and say that you told them you were atheist, and now they are making random assumptions about you. That's what what everybody did to me. But whatever, :)

markrs 0

Only devil worshiping lesbian alcoholics have fascinating lives

csickcman 11

Just thank the lucky stars you're not a vampire.

DropBearHunter 8

Only in America.....

When she shops for groceries. Get a empty beer bottle, a wegii (idk how to spell it) board and some really high boots. Rub the bottle against your cheek, set the board on the ground and wear those boots and she'll have her worst nighmare when she comes home to that.

Atleast you smell good.

It's ouija board

You googled that

rallets 22

no, some of us know how to spell ouija

iEthan, how bout you pay her a visit... That'd be a shock enough.

No I didn't google that, I just know how ouija is spelled

xoconnie 8

what a jerk ball

look on the bright side, at least your roommate thinks something of you (:

pinkp909 8

That should make life interesting from now on.

When my mother went into the wall, she screamed cucumber!

U shud go up to them drinking beer and wearing devil horns and try 2 kiss 1 of da girls

Yeah... No 35.

Apparently she's invisible too...

#35... It's You, Should, Two, One & The... But udda thn dat, I agree wit yo...

71, it's Other, than, that, with and you

'Whoosh!' went the sarcastic comment, as it flew over foodlord's head.

FYLDeep 25

With those kind of qualities why wouldn't your life be fascinating? Er, that's what you meant, right?

catharsis5 9

I love how you turned something negative into a positive

How can being a devil-worshiping lesbian alcoholic not be a positive?

Pretty sure it was bitter sarcasm.

You should make it awkward for them and walk in and say "what are you guys talking about?"

Dear god pay attention -.-

Of course your life is fascinating: you must be Charlie Sheen!

FML, accidentally thumbed up :(

The question is, WHO is she talking to if your presence is "absent"??? Sounds like she has issues....

DontModMeDammit 10

Roommates.."s"..plural.... ....

I think they like you!

If there's some interesting people out there it's got to be those Satanic drunken lesbians.