How I feel at the kid's table By Lewis - 19/01/2019 19:00 - France - Paris But mooooom! I'm a grown man! I agree, your life sucks 279 You deserved it 61 Share Tweet Share
Today, I yelled at a new employee for violating the company's makeup policy which is minimum coverage. She had red lipstick, very dark drawn eyebrows, and foundation that made her look like a ghost. She took out a makeup wipe and used it then showed me it, only to reveal she doesn't wear any. FML I agree, your life sucks 5 931 You deserved it 15 181
Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML I agree, your life sucks 52 238 You deserved it 4 080
Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 413 You deserved it 418
Today, I found out I had 3/4s of a Cheezit stuck in my sinus. No one knows how it got there, but the doctors found it while testing for COVID. I have an appointment soon to remove it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 076 You deserved it 236
Today, my son has the bizarre ability to remember any movie or series he has ever watched, even from the sounds without seeing the screen. He just identified Jumanji by the sound of Van Pelt's rifle, despite not having watched the movie in years… yet he only passed two GCSEs. FML I agree, your life sucks 695 You deserved it 214
Today, me, my sister, and my boyfriend all live together. It’s time to renew the lease. They used this as an opportunity to let me know that they’ve fallen in love and I will not be on the new lease. Our parents died in a car accident last year and I have no other family who will take me in. My sister knows this. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 262 You deserved it 124
Are his/her legs crossed?