Diets suck

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Manhattan

Today, it's the fourth day of my new diet. I told my friends and family to watch me every time I eat to make sure it's healthy. I got so desperate that I hid some chocolates in my pocket then scarfed them down while pooping. FML
I agree, your life sucks 19 186
You deserved it 50 335

Top comments

jonnied23 20

Don't do something if you're not dedicated to it

Comments

I agree about getting an app. Lose It! Is fantastic, b/c you slowly decrease your calorie intake, so it's not such a shock. I lost 30 lbs, and allowed myself a small amt of dark chocolate most days.

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How can someone eat chocolate while pooping??

If it's making you that miserable and desperate, it's not the diet for you. The point of dieting is to be healthy, and being happy is part of that. Of course, I don't know the whole story. Maybe this is a doctor-imposed diet for an imminent threat to your health? And hey, a bit of chocolate can be incorporated into a lot of healthy desserts. Chocolate in moderation is good for you. Anyway, I feel for you. Struggle with weight seems universal in this society. I've stopped trying to become "thin", but I'm still working on coming to terms with my own body. Good luck, girlie.

AntiPrude 26

It is only dark chocolate that is good for you in moderation. And basically you've given up on yourself. Thats like saying 'I've come to terms that I'm just a failure' You don't have to be a failure, you can fight, and change it. And if OP is miserable because of food, then she should do some exercise, because exercise, like food, releases dopamine and works as an anti-depressant. Thats why doctors tell depressed people first off to start exercising.

Thanks for the assumption It's not that I've stopped trying to be healthy, I've just stopped trying to land in the "skinny" range that is so hyped up these days. Being healthy and being thin are not synonymous.

These days I am healthy. But with my wide hips, huge rack, and natural curviness I will never be the lean size-4 girls that I used to envy.

It's not about size, it's about shape. I find women of all sizes sexy (not gay btw) as long as they have a waist. The hourglass figure doesn't really happen on twiggy girls though.

Hey man discipline. Try chewing gum. Helps a lot

I wonder if the chocolate was chocolate coon berries, the same kind that crazy uncle of the duck family ingested.

hannahsnyder69 16

I speak for most women when I say, we've been there

People seriously need to stop dieting! Just eat healthier and treat yourself every now and then. Also, I really hope you're doing cardio and some weight training (for anyone who thinks women shouldn't do weight training, you're wrong. Without it all the cardio will do is make you lose any muscle you have and make you flabby). A lot of people thing dieting by itself works. It doesn't.

sinekt 9

Hey, listen to this and listen good. I lost about 20 pounds in 2 weeks with this with no pain. It's called the Dukan diet, but some parts of it is bullshit, so I only took the smart part of it. Basically you can eat how much you want, whenever you want, no matter how many times a day, it just has to be low-fat meat (chicken, fish, etc.) and low fat dairies (low fat cheese, low fat milk etc.) and ONLY this, nothing else whatsoever, but whenever you're hungry. It's great, the food is delicious, hell, it's meat for christ's sake, you add a few spices to it and you have a delicious meal. I didn't even refrain from drinking cola and beer, and I should have, and STILL I lost 20 pounds in half a month. It was the first diet in my life, mostly because I consider all the other ones bullshit, and they really are bullshit, but when I heard about what it said, it sounded pretty clever. It really works, and it's not that painful at all. I got my insane moments, when I could rip a pizza apart, but after you chew on a big piece of chicken, there's no regret whatsoever for ditching that pizza. So if you do something, do it with brains. Do what I told you and come back with the results. ;)

sinekt 9

I forgot to say that indeed, I used some vitamins and mineral supplements, like Zinc, Magnesium and Calcium.

Live by the 80/20 rule. 80% Of the time super healthy and treat yourself sometimes. That way you don't go nuts. The challenge is making sure you keep the 80/20 balance