Nearly FMLs

By firsttimefailing - 05/02/2016 03:30 - United States - Edinburg

Today, the last day to get my work in for the semester, I'm stressing over a test that I was never administered. I am currently failing because of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By KingDomino - 05/02/2016 03:29 - United States - Towson

Today, I learned I have bronchitis as a result of sleep deprivation. On doctors orders, I am to miss a play in which I have a lead role. The entire reason I was staying up late was that I needed to memorize lines. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Colerich - 05/02/2016 03:21 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I actually felt like my acne was clearing up... on the left side of my face. The right still looks like a warzone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By JustinJK - 05/02/2016 03:15 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I dropped the replacement phone I received yesterday for the phone that I dropped and broke. I now have to spend another $175 for another replacement phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By madisonnnnnn - 05/02/2016 03:11 - United States - Parker

Today, after slipping on ice, I accidentally tripped my brother who was walking behind me, breaking his kneecap. In return he looked me straight in the eyes and punched me in the face, breaking my jaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By uh - 05/02/2016 03:11 - United States - Bear

Today, my 30 year old boyfriend moved back with his parents. This wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't the 6th time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Another one - 05/02/2016 02:53 - United States - Eagle River

Today, after dealing with a week of severe cramps, I finally went to the doctor. He told me that half of my colon wasn't working. HALF OF IT. I know have to spend my day off using laxatives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By wisdom teeth and school - 05/02/2016 02:26 - United States

Today, I accidentally took a strong painkiller right before I went to school. I felt dizzy while standing but figured I sit a lot at school anyway. The 50 year old school building sure chose a great day to have a fire alarm malfunction that sent us all standing on the field for two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Derik - 05/02/2016 01:51 - United States - Corpus Christi

Today, my girlfriend was upset at me for not wanting to have sex with her. This is only a week after she admitted she might be asexual. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Life is Great - 05/02/2016 01:49 - United States - Worcester

Today, my ex who I've been on and off with for close to a year, and still in love with, told me was gay and didn't love me anymore. You see that would've hurt a lot but it was much worse considering that he asked me back and said he wanted to work up to a relationship again, only three days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 05/02/2016 01:42 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my mom called me from the hospital & I was really excited because I missed her. When I answered the phone, she goes "Oh, it's you..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 05/02/2016 01:29 - United States - Riverside

Today, the power went off at work at 10:30. Boss asked me to stay for 15 mins. After 3 freaking hours of waiting "just another 15 mins" he finally said I could go home at 1:45. I had one foot out the door at 1:45, then the power turned back on at 1:46. Boss made me stay until closing by myself. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By spanj - 05/02/2016 01:26 - United States - Maple Grove

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him for the first time. He responded with "that's too bad, but thanks". FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By ugh - 05/02/2016 01:15 - United States - Fremont

Today, I was making cupcakes with my grandparents while my dad went out to dinner. I did most of the work while my sister played the computer. She told me to watch her game for a minute and just as I sat down my dad walked in and thought I did nothing and my sister did all of the work. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By mzclutchie - 05/02/2016 01:15 - United States - Toledo

Today, my mother started an argument with me. I didn't call her out on the fact that I pay the bills while she sits on her ass all day, simply because she'd kick me and my two kids out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 05/02/2016 01:15 - New Zealand

Today, I was having an amazing dream featuring myself and some sexy hunk. Things were about to get steamy in the shower when he admitted he was gay. My own head is frendzoning me. Fml.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Enderking231 - 05/02/2016 01:04 - United States - Modesto

Today, I was petting my small dog. When I stopped, she thought it would be a good idea to launch herself off my balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By bloobalooby - 05/02/2016 00:39 - United States

Today, I emailed an assignment to my teacher early so that I wouldn't forget to print it in the morning. When I was about to start her class, I realized I'd forgotten to attach the document to the email. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Chicagoillinois - 05/02/2016 00:23 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, was my birthday, the only one to remember was a website I forgot I signed up for six years ago that sent out an automatic email. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 05/02/2016 00:12 - Canada - Victoria

Today, I had to pick my 6 year old son up from the ER after his teacher caught him putting rocks in his ear that wouldn't come out. The principal called me later, told me there was something seriously wrong with my kid and asked if I'd ever heard of "Demon Possession" FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Sir bombastic - 05/02/2016 00:12 - United States - Morehead

today, on the bus, my girlfriend, who has a nose ring, decided to nap on my 3-ring binder which was on my leg. When i was about to get off the bus, she jerked up and her ring caught on the ring on the binder. It pulled a chunck of nose flesh out and i got the blame. Now people think i abuse her.FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By anonymous - 05/02/2016 00:02 - United States - Houston

Today, I passed out in my new friend's hot/stifling car because I was too afraid to ask if we could turn on the AC. I'm 26. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By pisshead - 04/02/2016 23:34 - United Kingdom - Dagenham

Today, I got so drunk that whilst walking home I kept thinking I was peeing myself. This would've been fine if I also wasn't asking my boyfriend every 5 minutes to feel and make sure I hadn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 04/02/2016 23:27 - United States - Salem

Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. Since my mom was wearing a strap on, I think I can figure the rest out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 04/02/2016 22:57 - United States - La Grange

Today, I asked the girl i've like for a while on a date, she rejected me, saying she was a lesbian. I would of been fine with that if i did not catch her making out with my 19 year old brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By lala150 - 04/02/2016 22:57 - Canada - Tillsonburg

Today, I found out I'll need to cancel the appointment I made two days ago because I'm pregnant. The appointment was for a tubal ligation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By koala189 - 04/02/2016 22:48 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, I was watching porn with headphones on. Maybe next time I should make sure that they are plugged in properly instead of having my mom tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 04/02/2016 22:40 - United States - Tyrone

Today, while walking down the street, I had to cross the road. And elderly lady was sitting at the intersection. I pressed the "Walk" button and started crossing. As soon as I stepped in front of her car, she gunned the motor and ran over my legs. Greetings from the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By Carless - 04/02/2016 22:36 - United States - Anchorage

Today, my car got towed because I was in someone else's parking spot. I left a note on my vehicle asking them to come to my apartment to ask me to move my car if need be, but I put too much faith in humanity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

By AaLlIiYyAaHh - 04/02/2016 22:29 - Netherlands - Eindhoven

Today, i found out at school i was on my period, when i looked down and saw blood on my pants. No one told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, my estranged, psycho ex called me ten times and left belligerent messages because I didn't send him anything for his birthday yesterday like I used to. This is the same man who never gave me a birthday gift, text, or even a Happy Birthday wish during our 7 years together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 731

You deserved it 419

Today, I was leaving the grocery store when an old woman started yelling at me for not holding the door open for her. She accused me of being "everything wrong with the younger generation". It was an automatic door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 242

You deserved it 3 286

Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 980

You deserved it 7 938

Today, my boyfriend proposed. He gave me a really unique ring that I absolutely loved… at first. When I showed it off to my friends, one of them laughed so hard that she started crying, and said it looks just like a vagina. She's right, and now I can't unsee it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 134

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110 681

You deserved it 27 072

Today, I was escorted out of the building for getting in a scuffle at my anger management class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 719

You deserved it 28 623