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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    History

    You mean it isn't??

    By Anonymous - 28/01/2024 22:00 - United States - Jacksonville

    Today, I got roasted in class because I could've swore that the story of Robin Hood was in the Bible. I was so cocksure of myself, but I guess I shouldn't repeat stuff my dad told me for a laugh when I was about 9 years-old, now that I'm in college. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 104
    You deserved it 1 002
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    Dragons aren't real

    By IHaveThePower - 12/10/2022 08:00 - Canada - Ottawa

    Today, I had to explain to two different educated adults - one with an IT background and one pure maths Master - that dystopian literature is not an accurate historical record of the Middle Ages. Somebody get STEM majors some humanities… FML
    I agree, your life sucks 776
    You deserved it 167
    Share  

    Don't know much about history…

    By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 16:00

    Today, my daughter actually asked me who Martin Luther king Jr was. This girl, this African American daughter of mine, with full access to the internet, who has completed a college education, doesn’t know who one of the most important black men in history is. I need to lie down. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 771
    You deserved it 1 023
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    • 1
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    Keywords

    Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, my boyfriend was breaking up with me because he felt his needs were not met. I asked what I could do to change his mind. He said, "Suck my dick, right now." It got me more turned on than I thought possible. What is wrong with me? FML
    I agree, your life sucks 151
    You deserved it 503
    Today, my wife and I were Skyping, when she decided to put on a "show" for me. Seconds before she was about to climax, we lost internet connection. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 26 935
    You deserved it 2 559
    Today, I brought my Tinder date back to my house to cook for her. I made her gnocchi, because she had never had it before. She forgot to tell me she was lactose intolerant, and proceeded to spend the next 30 minutes violently and loudly shitting. I poisoned my date. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 644
    You deserved it 129
    Today, my boyfriend found out I have OCD. When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other or I freak. After I brushed his face with the back of my hand he tackled me to the floor, held me down, and laughed at me while I panicked and tried to touch him with my other hand. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 53 358
    You deserved it 16 372
    Today, at 4 a.m., I woke up so I could check out the blood moon. It looked magnificent, so I took a few photos and went back to bed. When I later got up, I noticed the orange street light outside. I’d been admiring a street lamp. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 884
    You deserved it 414
    Today, my boyfriend and I were looking for our bubblegum flavored "numbing" lotion to have some morning fun. We couldn’t find it anywhere. After about 10 minutes, my little nephew comes from my room crying and drool coming out of his mouth. He smelt like bubblegum, his mouth and tongue were all numb. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 36 658
    You deserved it 9 220
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