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Have you just experienced an FML?

Feel like sharing it with the other users of FML?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story passes through the moderation process, it will published in the next 24 hours.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Candy

    Never again

    By Lex - 21/05/2025 21:00 - United States - Edison

    Today, I gave my kid some Pop Rocks. He shoveled a handful in his mouth, then screamed when they started popping and spat them all over the carpet. FML
    agreeclassic 123
    vote type 1 450
    Share  

    Be proud, stand tall

    By fiddlercrab - 27/03/2022 03:00 - United Kingdom - Brierley Hill

    Today, I'd like to thank Alexa for my notification, saying ”You bought a 4-pound bag of Jawbreakers recently, would you like to share your feedback with Amazon prime customers?" My wife heard the message and laughed. FML
    agreeclassic 661
    vote type 1 410
    Share  

    Crybabies

    By PooperParty - 05/04/2021 11:00

    Today, I had an Easter Egg Hunt in my backyard for my kids. When they collected all the eggs, they opened them and to their dismay there was no candy inside. When I bought them, I thought they already came with candy. It’s been two hours and my kids won’t stop crying. FML
    agreeclassic 404
    vote type 1 1 828
    Share  
    • 1
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    Keywords

    Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home
    Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, I went to my regular pharmacist of three months, and since I've always seen him on a crutch, I asked him how his leg was. His response, "Still missing". FML
    agreeclassic 27 507
    vote type 1 7 025
    Today, I met up with my estranged father for the first time in almost 15 years. I saw him again later, while he was robbing my house. FML
    agreeclassic 51 839
    vote type 1 3 144
    Today, I was trying to use the video editing software on my computer for a group project. It then wanted me to purchase another program that cost over $130. One of my teammates told me to buy it, because, "I could afford to skip a few lunches." FML
    agreeclassic 9 582
    vote type 1 949
    Today, I was literally taking care of my coworker's garbage. Piss was dumped on me as I lifted the Herbie Kirby to the larger dumpster. What the fuck, people? Don’t literally leave your waste for others to take care of. FML
    agreeclassic 618
    vote type 1 132
    Today, I arrived at work, only to be arrested and accused of stealing over $8000 from my job. Five hours later at the police station, the discovery was made that the actual thief had an employee ID one digit different than mine. He works at another location over 1200 miles away. FML
    agreeclassic 74 377
    vote type 1 2 772
    Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML
    agreeclassic 54 178
    vote type 1 23 624
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