Work: Today, I was working the night shift at the hotel. One of my...

By soakedga - United States - Statesboro

Today, I was working the night shift at the hotel. One of my tasks is to clean out the pool robot. While trying to pull it up, I got pulled in. I had to hide naked in the laundry room for an hour while I put my uniform through the dryer. FML

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soakedga tells us more :

OP here- yeah I did wrap up in a sheet. No extra uniforms that I could get to- they were all locked in the GM's office. And I'm a woman small enough to be pulled into the pool by a cleaning robot. Oh- there was a camera that I managed to avoid for the most part, but my boss did get a kick out of seeing me trying not to let the sheet fall while I shoved my clothes in the dryer.

Work

You tried

Quite the journey

Health? Care? Never

By booearns - United States

Today, I visited my doctor upon coming home from University. I found out that I'm severely allergic to our pet bunny, which has resulted in a rash taking over my body. She suggested that we get rid of the bunny. I told my mom. She told me to come home less often. FML

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By Tomaino

Today, my best friend got drunk and told me he's only friends with me because no one else will be friends with him. He then went on to tell me that he wasn't actually that drunk. FML

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By princeronron - Switzerland - Prilly

Today, I spilled the bowl of cat food I'd just filled. I picked it all up in front of my cat, but he refused to eat any of it. I had to put the food back into the packet and fill the bowl all over again. My cat is a prince. FML

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By Loola - France

Today, Father Christmas touched my ass in a shopping mall. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen on Christmas Day. FML

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By Anonymous - 17/2/2021 11:01

Cognitive dissonance

Today, in the same conversation with the same person, I got chewed out because our kids want to spend more time with me than her, and also because the kids spend too much time with her and she can’t work from home effectively. Can anyone explain how that works? FML

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By Anonymous

Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally decided to tell my mother, a former Miss North Carolina winner, that I was several weeks pregnant. She immediately burst into tears and hugged me. She kept saying, "Thank god, thank god." At first I was relieved. Then she said, "I thought you were just getting fat." FML

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By failureatlife - United States - Ponchatoula

Today, after beating myself up for being useless and not being able to do anything right, I managed to choke almost to the point of blacking out, on a piece of lettuce. FML

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By dumped - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me because the love advice that she gets on her cellphone every week says that I'm cheating on her. I've never cheated on her and I was planning to propose next week. FML

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By edulover - United States

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

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By Taylor parsons - United States

Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML

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By rukus - Canada

Today, I was was leaving the library when I noticed an elderly woman being mugged. I was about to leave on my bike, but promptly went to help her. After I managed to scare off the mugger, I helped her to her car. As I was heading back to my bike, I notice the mugger riding off on it. FML

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By Anonymous - Jamaica - Kingston

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML

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By fishingforubies2 - Aruba - Oranjestad

Today, it was my first day working at a library. I expected it to be fun and peaceful, not to end up having to call the cops on a guy who started jerking off into a book. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

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By Samantha

Today, I discovered that my parents made a game out of my mental illness. Every morning, they have a bet on which one of them can make me cry first. FML

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By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Uddingston

Today, I got dragged to dinner with my grandparents. It was awful from the start, but things took a turn for the worse when my grandpa went to give me a kiss on the cheek as we left. I could clearly see lice crawling around in his beard, and I couldn't stop it from touching my face. FML

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By soccerbuddyz - United States

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

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By bloody_hell - United States - Elkhart

Today, I was faced with the inevitable horrible circumstances which lead me to put in a tampon on a moving city bus. FML

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By Chicketi - Canada

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

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By moorox45 - United States

Today, I put on a pair of sneakers that I'd left outside, and went jogging. After several minutes of pain, I pulled off one of the sneakers, only to find dozens of baby spiders had moved in. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I noticed a spot of water on the floor. I thought my cats had spilled a cup of water and didn't worry about it. I went to a meeting and when I came back, my entire apartment was flooded with 3 inches of water. FML

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By "crawforda350"

Today, while stocking up in preparation for Hurricane Irma, an old lady hit me over the head with her walker. She wanted the loaf of bread I'd grabbed. FML

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By Blueberrypicc - United States

Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML

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By Susan - Ireland

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

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By raaquel - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend of 5 years has been cheating on me with a Realtor. The same Realtor who helped me sell my condo so I could move in with my boyfriend. FML

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By faeliality - United States

Today, I discovered that yes, you CAN forget how to ride a bike. Too bad I discovered this in front of all my son's friends and their parents while at his birthday party. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I was sad I'd forgotten to bake him the cookies that I was planning to send to him for Christmas. His response was "Good, you suck at cooking anyway." FML

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By bitchyskier - United States

Today, while waiting in line for the ski lift, the lady behind me kept stepping on my skis. Annoyed, I turned around and shouted at her "Get the f*ck off my skis!" Just as the last word escaped my mouth, I noticed that my skis were crossed and it was actually me stepping on them. FML

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By therundown - United States

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

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By Etyl - Indonesia

Today, I struggled through a one hour traffic jam to get to the airport to pick up my dad who was just coming back from an overseas trip. I got there only to find that he had given me the wrong date, and I had to drive home. Best part? I have to do it all over again tomorrow. FML

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By CassidyQueen - United States - Warrenton

Today, I moved in with my boyfriend because my parents kicked me out. He said that if I ever touch his "fucking apple jacks" he will "chop" my nipples off and feed them to the dog. FML

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By failedmusician - New Zealand

Today, my band went to play a set for the first time. I'm the drummer. All was going well, and then before our first song I threw the sticks in the air, went to catch them, and one hit me right in the eye. I couldn't continue playing. Now I have to wear an eyepatch. FML

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By Myboyfriendisaromanticslob - Canada

Today, my boyfriend set up a very romantic dinner. Afterwards, he offered to wash the dishes while I went upstairs and relaxed. His way of washing the dishes was to scrape all the food off, then wipe the juices off the dishes with a paper towel before putting them back in the cupboards. FML

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By bluediva24

Today, I spent all day preparing a big, elaborate Italian dinner for my boyfriend, who recently discovered he was part Italian. He came home, turned up his nose and said "I was in the mood for Chinese". FML

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By Lee - United States

Today, we spread my uncle's ashes at my grandparent's house. We were on a hill overlooking a sunset. It was a beautiful ceremony... until the winds changed direction. Our whole family wound up covered in my Uncle. He's still stuck in my hair. FML

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By fuckfuck - United States - Fort Smith

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering mail, I was yelled at by a guy, who threatened to shoot me if I "trespassed" on his property. He made me toss his mail toward his porch from the street, before telling me to get lost. FML

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By thisistypical - United States

Today, I found out that the money my husband said he loaned to his "mother" actually went to the purchase of new lingerie for the woman he's cheating on me with. I just got the bill from the department store. FML

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By headache

Today, I have a new office-mate. I'm not particularly sensitive to odours but he wears so much cologne, I nearly throw up every time he walks in. Only 8 more hours till fresh air. FML

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By Anonymous

Today, I was friendzoned by my boyfriend due to the fact that we never fight. Apparently, if there's no fighting, there's no passion. FML

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Top comments

By tacojauns | 45

#5440632 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:09

I'm impressed all this without getting caught. A+ for you mister

By kimg0885 | 23

#5440623 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:07

Isn't there any spare uniforms ?

COMMENTS

By kimg0885 | 23

#5440623 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:07

Isn't there any spare uniforms ?

lilhellian | 26

#5440645 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:11

Op will get confused as someone else..

NurseJonathan | 9

#5440648 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:11

There might have been some, however may not have been in the laundry room.

jarrettd | 27

#5440666 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:18

You weren't alone op. i was there.

Bloodjoker | 11

#5440681 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:30

I'm gonna say no... unless he's used to hiding naked in the laundry room and that's his happy place :-)

annihil8or | 15

#5440732 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 0:18

How do you know op is a guy?

NurseJonathan | 9

#5440734 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 0:20

We don't. But if Original Poster were a male or female, the kink factor the robot pulled on them was still nice.

ironichalibut | 24

#5440880 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 1:51

17- I don't always comment on people's pictures, but when I do, it's because it made their comment oh-so much sweeter.

5n000w | 4

#5441003 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 4:03

*Aren't there

ohSNAPyall | 26

#5441078 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 5:24

Or at least a towel?

Or some sheets... Toga time!

fishstick557 | 14

#5441099 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 6:09

Just like spongebob he lost his identity

kyu_Q | 19

#5441191 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 9:05

If there is a pool wouldn't there be towels near by?

By CrimsonAmaryllis | 18

#5440628 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:08

FYL. Accosted and beaten by a robot XD

Misswildsides | 22

#5440644 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:11

Robots are slowly taking over the world!

ArielTheMermaid | 17

#5440844 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 1:23

Everybody run for your lives! Robots are taking over the world...our world!

ohgeejosee | 19

#5447463 - Saturday 13 April 2013 20:39

"Hello! You've reached the Navy's automation telephone service..." THE ROBOTS ARE RUNNING THE NAVY!

By snufflebubble | 13

#5440629 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:08

There's got to be a better way. Surely your work had spare uniforms just in case. Hopefully theres no security feeds in the laundry room and no one ever finds out.

Shenanigans9 | 8

#5440656 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:13

The robot saw it and is now probably scarred for life.

By tacojauns | 45

#5440632 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:09

I'm impressed all this without getting caught. A+ for you mister

TrueTriage | 16

#5441034 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 4:38

We've found the ninja that would show up on people's roofs to point at others then disappear.

By marcranger | 28

#5440633 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:09

This is clearly just the first stage. Next thing you know, Skynet's gonna go live.

By scottyspot | 11

#5440634 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:09

Skinny dipping with a robot ftw!

NurseJonathan | 9

#5440708 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:49

Don't tempt it to activate the filter on you...

By Wizardo | 33

#5440635 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:09

You should've taken a page out of Borat and run around the hotel stark naked, but hiding works too...

mattlw | 25

#5440703 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:48

I think there is a big difference in doing that when you are patronizing a hotel vs. working at the hotel.

By jelly713 | 19

#5440636 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:09

I would have wrapped myself up in a clean bed sheet if there wasn't spare uniforms. You know, walk around in a toga waiting for the uniform to dry. It's better than being naked at work.

ballpython | 15

#5441002 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 4:02

Agreed. I also work the night shift at a hotel. I have had my pants get soaked and had to wear only underwear from the waist down. I would have never gone naked and would have at the very least worn a towel of sheet.

By Pleonasm | 34

#5440641 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:10

You're off the deep end... Because you're telling me you couldn't find any towels or spare clothes or sheets or /anything/?

Shenanigans9 | 8

#5440657 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:14

Op really got thrown off the diving board this time.

mattlw | 25

#5440706 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:49

At least they would have had bath robes.

Cleu | 12

#5440836 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 1:19

I agree with number 9! Get a wire sheet and cut some eye holes on it, then if anyone enters the room you can scare them out!

Cleu | 12

#5440840 - Tuesday 9 April 2013 1:20

White*

By shorty6823 | 28

#5440642 - Monday 8 April 2013 23:10

At least it was the less busy night shift so it'd be easier to hide. Day shift would have been horrible.