Holidays: Today, I received an email telling me that the t-shirt I ordered...

By bookworm4332 - 23/12/2016 19:50 - United States - King George

Today, I received an email telling me that the t-shirt I ordered almost a month ago as a Christmas present for my brother had finally been delivered. Unfortunately, it was delivered to my college dorm, which is 2 hours away. I won't be able to pick it up until mid-January. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 417

You deserved it 982

bookworm4332 tells us more.

bookworm4332 9

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Sunday 25 December 2016 8:21

OP here, thanks for the kind words y'all. Just to clear up a few things, I ordered this shirt back in November and it was supposed to be delivered to my dorm in early December. When it didn't arrive, I contacted the company and they agreed to ship another one to my home address, since it would be delivered after I left for break. It seems like there was some kind of mix-up on their end, as their "your package was delivered" email lists my home address but the UPS tracking number shows it was delivered to my dorm. Unfortunately, first-year housing at my school operates mail out of a mailroom, which is closed until January since first years are not allowed to stay in dorms over winter break. So I think that even if I made the drive out to get it, the package would probably be inaccessible to me. Oh well ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Holidays

Vulture

Animal lover

Too much irony

By Anonymous - 18/11/2015 14:50 - Canada

Today, I read the instructions on my new prescription constipation medicine: "For best results, defecate before use." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 656

You deserved it 1 703

By Katsura - 19/07/2016 00:43 - United States - Perrysburg

Today, my boyfriend wanted to get into an open relationship. He has no romantic feelings for me anymore, but he didn't want to separate from my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 088

You deserved it 1 362

By our kids will be derps - 22/06/2013 19:28 - Canada - Nelson

Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 409

You deserved it 6 921

By WaltTheFuckDad - 01/09/2013 23:06 - United States - Salida

Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 296

You deserved it 3 583

By All Dressed Up With No Place To Go - 11/09/2015 05:57 - United States - Ashland

Today, I finally lost enough weight to fit into the beautiful dress that I ordered for my senior prom. I graduated from high school in 2010. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 407

You deserved it 4 878

By lonely - 15/04/2013 03:45 - United States

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house. After asking him what was wrong due to his weird attitude, he responded with, "This isn't working; I'm in love with my sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 637

You deserved it 4 511

By ChelseaRae - 06/07/2011 05:11 - United States

Today, I was flipping through a magazine and saw an ad that had the line "No corn, no wheat, no soy", all of which I'm severely allergic to. I got so excited at the prospect of having a food I could eat, I fell out of my chair. I then realized it was an ad for dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 437

You deserved it 5 525

By ww2freak - 14/06/2012 01:17 - United States - Centreville

Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 910

You deserved it 27 280

Is it slander or libel?

By Anonymous - 10/08/2019 00:01

Today, I posted a review, on a strictly anonymous site, about a doctor I went to see for my anxiety but who actually made me worse. A while later, the same doctor called my home phone, addressed me by my full name and threatened to sue me for slander if I didn't take down the review. All of which was 100% true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 486

You deserved it 178

By Noname - 13/02/2009 03:46 - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he said the relationship was too tough for him. When I asked for an example, he responded, "Like, I don't have enough time to play World of Warcraft." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 586

You deserved it 7 862

By loser doctor - 02/01/2009 11:14 - Philippines

Today, I found out the girl I was in love with has a new boyfriend. I blame myself because I believed her when she said she "wasn't ready" for a relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 022

You deserved it 4 334

Sexy catboys rule my life

By verno02 - 10/08/2010 23:58 - Canada

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 992

You deserved it 8 769

By Brooke - 14/08/2015 16:50 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 716

You deserved it 2 332

By Jessey - 18/06/2009 13:05 - United Kingdom

Today, we were having a school prize giving. I heard my name called and I walked up to the stage waving and smiling, feeling rather proud of myself. I stood by the microphone and started my acceptance speech, only to be tapped on the shoulder by the girl they actually called up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 753

You deserved it 47 773

Dealbreaker

By banarama - 05/02/2021 07:54

Today, I found out that the person I'm seeing is a terrible kisser. I really like them, but it's awful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 736

You deserved it 169

Time consumed

By unendowed - 18/03/2012 02:11 - United States - Katy

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to go down on me with chewing gum in her mouth. I spent the next hour and a half getting Orbit out of my pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 314

You deserved it 11 656

Snow day

By doggie_doo_face - 06/02/2010 00:50 - United States

Today, my dog accidentally crapped on her leash. When I flicked the leash to get the poo off, it went flying. Have you ever had warm poo hit you in the face on a cold day when there's 6 inches of snow on the ground? I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 028

You deserved it 9 678

By MotherMary - 12/10/2014 13:21 - United States - Park Hills

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of three years, who can't get it up for me and has been blaming blood pressure issues, apparently has no problem getting it up while watching the neighbor undress from our window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 983

You deserved it 5 254

By girl - 22/11/2009 00:36 - United States

Today, in dance class we did a choreography where we wear two shirts and take one off in one quick motion. After I took mine off, the audience goes "aaah". Then I realize that I had taken both my shirts off as stood there with only my bra on. I was being videotaped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 242

You deserved it 6 424

By rocks_hurt - 16/08/2018 13:00

Today, I rushed to catch my bus and arrived as it pulled up, but one of the tires threw a rock at my head and knocked me out. I missed my bus and the final that I am not allowed to retake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 112

You deserved it 239

By Suicidal - 20/12/2009 22:40 - Australia

Today, I had a mental breakdown after going through severe depression for several years. I told my boyfriend that everybody thinks I'm useless, to which he replied, "No you're not. You cook me good dinners." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 023

You deserved it 7 688

Cheap-ass perv!

By Allison Arsenault - 07/06/2020 08:08

Today, I found out my boyfriend of 5 years thinks that it is too expensive to get married, go on vacations, concerts, etc., but spends $100+/month on Hentai. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 816

You deserved it 431

Wrong size

By ali927truthh - 12/01/2020 03:00

Today, when I finally got delivered the new kitchen table that I ordered online a week ago, I found out that it was actually a kitchen table for a dollhouse, as I forgot to check the size. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 2 583

By anonymous - 18/06/2009 14:04 - Norway

Today, I saw my crush walking on the other side of the street. She hadn't noticed me, so when she did I nonchalantly looked over and casually waved to look cool. I then walked right into a lamp post. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 560

You deserved it 38 093

By nycplywood - 18/11/2009 21:01 - United States

Today, I learned that if you stare at your cat and her eyes suddenly get really big, it means she's going to maul your face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 373

You deserved it 32 024

Jailbait

By "Riotxxo" - 18/01/2022 16:58

Today, after confessing to my 16 year-old sister that I was only into guys younger than me, she said that was OK because she was attracted to guys in their late 40's and that an age gap was not that much of a big deal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 422

You deserved it 159

By kclopez - 19/08/2017 23:15

Today, while going through customs at the airport, my bag was selected for screening. It was nearly overflowing because it was so full, so before the TSA agent searched it, I said, "Watch out - it's going to explode when you open it". Wrong choice of words. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 314

You deserved it 4 715

Tell us more

By kateannobrien - 11/08/2021 20:01

Today, my birthday was terrible yet again. This year, my boyfriend skipped celebrating with me at all. Last year, he guilt-tripped me about ‘having’ to spend time with me and got me two gift certificates that were unusable due to COVID. These weren’t even my worst birthdays to date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 815

You deserved it 154

By Anonymous - 03/11/2009 04:33 - Canada

Today, the police came to my door and told me about a woman who called the cops on me because she said that I had been following her in my car. We were on the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 047

You deserved it 2 008

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:52 - United States

Today, I spent almost two hours cleaning my fish tank, only to find out that my cat had secretly eaten all of my fish while I was cleaning the tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 446

You deserved it 8 395

By amber - 13/03/2010 09:03 - United States

Today, I bitched out my boyfriend for logging into my facebook account and deleting EVERY male (even family) off my friends list. He accused me of wanting to cheat on him and has forced me to say "sorry." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 768

You deserved it 17 688

By captainuniverse - 14/05/2016 05:53 - United States - Nashville

Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. She also said I'm going to be an uncle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 004

You deserved it 1 269

By Anonymous - 22/04/2009 17:10 - United States

Today, I was crocheting while watching television, and thinking to myself how proud I was that I taught myself to crochet. Then, an episode of Golden Girls came on, and I watched that while I crocheted. I'm 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 814

You deserved it 40 496

By disgusted - 25/09/2014 04:03 - United States - East Waterboro

Today, while working as a teacher at a daycare, a two year-old girl decided the best way to share that she had pooped was to reach in her diaper and attempt to hand some to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 202

You deserved it 3 444

By louie - 31/01/2012 20:17 - United States

Today, I went to see a doctor about some of the memory problems I've been having. After the appointment, I could barely remember a thing he told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 034

You deserved it 3 190

By KnowWhereYourTowelIs - 14/08/2013 07:13 - United Kingdom - Eastbourne

Today, I won a year's supply of bath bombs in a competition. I live in a tiny flat by myself with only a shower. I also have to find somewhere to put the bath bombs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 779

You deserved it 6 104

By jcstpierre - 24/04/2009 10:41 - United States

Today, I received a mass email from my boss saying we had a position open at the daycare I work at. I knew my boyfriend was looking for a job so I insisted he apply. Later at work, my boss takes me into her office and tells me my employment is being "terminated". My boyfriend is replacing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 497

You deserved it 5 570

By Daddy - 10/11/2008 12:06 - France

Today, I gave my son a bollocking for losing a very important paper that I needed for work. I've just found it in my right pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 454

You deserved it 59 575

By Anonymous - 10/08/2012 05:29 - Europe

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 594

You deserved it 18 189

By Anonymous - 03/12/2011 18:11 - United States

Today, while I was putting up Christmas lights, my younger brother wouldn't stop pestering me. It seems he hadn't forgotten the time I gave myself an electric shock last year, and he wanted to see if I'd do it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 160

You deserved it 3 565

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Top comments

trucker2 33

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Saturday 24 December 2016 2:34

Is it possible to have someone Overnite it to you- ups and Fedex are working till 5 pm Christmas day

almost_there44 26

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Saturday 24 December 2016 20:16

He lives in a dorm. Schools and dorms are closed during breaks, unless there are special circumstances. Nobody is working at the front desk, therfore OP's package might not be delivered to the dorm, but might be dropped off at the post office. It's not worth a drive, school starts in 3 weeks.

maritime1992 5

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Saturday 24 December 2016 2:30

Next time, checking the shipping address. That's on you.

almost_there44 26

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Saturday 24 December 2016 3:12

It's not on him. He ordered it a month ago while he was at college, so I'm assuming he wanted it to be shipped to his dorm so he could have received it and brought it to his house on his own. It's on the shipping company. At least that's how I see it.

PraesensAbsens 0

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Saturday 24 December 2016 9:22

How on earth is this on the shipping company? :) My guess is that it's one of those custom t-shirts that always take ages to deliver. The shipping company just did what it was supposed to do.

Aylla89 3

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Saturday 24 December 2016 17:21

Let's not automatically victim blame here. In reality land, shipping companies make mistakes as well no matter information is given. OP could have had both addresses written with the most recent being the current. I'm not going to go guess whether user error or company error happen more, they do both occur.

trucker2 33

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Saturday 24 December 2016 2:34

Is it possible to have someone Overnite it to you- ups and Fedex are working till 5 pm Christmas day

Aylla89 3

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Saturday 24 December 2016 2:36

Can't just drive 2 hours there and back. There has to be some free time frame.

Core5555 9

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Saturday 24 December 2016 5:01

A 4 hour trip.. Just skip on over and pick up your shirt in your free time. /s

Aylla89 3

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Saturday 24 December 2016 17:17

There are truckers and other commuters who drive that or more daily. It just depends on OP's schedule and how determined they are. I could see if it was 4+ hours each way and not a total trip time. Maybe I'm just stubborn and if life randomly decides to screw me over on time or distance, I typically fight it if possible.

OhYouAreOffended 11

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Saturday 24 December 2016 17:49

Yeah, unless they don't have a car and got picked up from their dorm, which i doubt, they should be just fine to go get the shirt.

RichardPencil 30

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Saturday 24 December 2016 2:42

New family tradition: Martin Luther King Day gift exchange!

AussieGirl92 0

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Saturday 24 December 2016 3:03

I feel your pain, I ordered a shirt for my mum 8 weeks ago. It arrived at my house yesterday, 3 days after I left to come to my patents for Christmas. My house is a 6hr car trip away, I don't drive so 8hr, 4/5 trains and a bus away. I'm not due to go home till late January.

Lalala579121 27

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Saturday 24 December 2016 4:32

I think your mom would like a patent much better than a shirt anyways, so you're probably okay.

AussieGirl92 0

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Saturday 24 December 2016 9:56

its actually a custom made shirt with all her grand children's names on it, even if not my mum isn't shallow and would love anything my children and I got her because she knows its been thought about and brought with love

almost_there44 26

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Saturday 24 December 2016 3:24

I would have asked the shipping company weeks ago where the hell my package was. Did you not track it? Although I do see your dilemma, there are times, especially around the holidays where you have to be assertive because some companies don't give a damn about other people's things. Your brother will understand; you can ship the package to him in January...with a different company.

Colon_Man 17

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Saturday 24 December 2016 14:19

I ordered a TV wall mount a while back and Fed-Ex held on to it for two weeks. The tracker finally showed it was going to be delivered on a Saturday, so I kept popping my head out of the door to check. I happened to do so just as the van was slowing down for my drive way and the lady saw me and sped away. Then, the tracker shows that she dropped it off at the post office - for delivery on Monday! WTF?

big_lil_wane 14

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Saturday 24 December 2016 7:43

I have that same problem, only my college is three hours away. Sorry OP

Bearsmomma 30

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Saturday 24 December 2016 13:34

Couldn't you make a fun road trip day with family or friends from your hometown? 2 hours (one way) isn't so far if it means that much to you, especially if you can make the trip an adventure with someone special.

RosesThorn17 7

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Saturday 24 December 2016 13:45

there's 24 hours in a day... it would take about 5 hours at most to go get it for him. 2 hours there, an hour (if it even takes that long it should only take a couple of minutes really, so yeah,) 2 hours back. It's not that difficult. I used to drive 2 hours to work everyday at one point in my life so get over it and get your bro his gift.

Colon_Man 17

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Saturday 24 December 2016 14:23

I drive 10 hours a day and deliver 250,000lbs of freight. Yeah. A few hours ain't no big.

almost_there44 26

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Saturday 24 December 2016 20:16

Colon_Man 17

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Saturday 24 December 2016 20:18

I realize that sounds sarcastic. It's actually my job. I drive a delivery truck.

LoverWordsFood 27

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Saturday 24 December 2016 16:41

I know it's not about the gifts in Christmas but it's neat to get someone you love something awesome that they wouldn't get for themselves. So I know how you feel OP. I ordered my father a collectible and it was suppose to be delivered 2 weeks ago. However, I recieved two emails about how production is being delayed and it won't ship out til march/April next year. Kinda upsetting for me since this man is such a pain to get anything for him on any occasion. Just explain to your brother and he'll hopefully understand.