Miscellaneous: Today, I learned that before you tell a blonde joke, you should...

By Owww1 - 22/04/2015 19:20 - United States - Bullhead City

Today, I learned that before you tell a blonde joke, you should make sure that your high school's 6'8", 275-pound, blond quarterback isn't standing behind you. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 052

You deserved it 25 591

Owww1 tells us more.

Owww1 5

Thursday 23 April 2015 10:43

Why did the mirror have holes in it? A moron kept trying to shoot himself.

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

abNormal62 23

Thursday 23 April 2015 8:29

How many times did you have to explain the joke to him?

coklara 15

Thursday 23 April 2015 8:30

So, a 6'8", 275lb. Blonde walks into a bar...

Comments

TallMist 32

Friday 24 April 2015 2:03

No idea why my reply was removed. All I did was ask how the person standing behind OP proved the OP's point.

cgreen0710 4

Friday 24 April 2015 3:12

Really a 275 pound quarterback ?

Keywords

Embarrassing Transportation Awkward Cars Babysitter Family Relatable Kids Money Thief Health Depression Mental health Wanker Work Bodyshaming Love Vacation Annoying Students Parenting Intimacy AITA First Dates Singing Animals Cats Weddings Public freakouts Cops

The Top

Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 091

You deserved it 20 809

Today, I was at the grocery store when I bumped into my ex. Trying to be polite, I asked how she was doing, only for her to reply, "Great, thanks! I'm actually getting married next month." Meanwhile, I was standing there in a Garfield t-shirt clutching a carton of Ben & Jerry's and a bottle of cheap wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 144

The Top

Today, I got a letter saying I was no longer a student at my college and my current work is void since I had ignored and refused to pay my tuition bill. Over the past month I've been deleting these pesky emails saying 'FINAL WARNING regarding payment' thinking it was more spam. They weren't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 269

You deserved it 140 485

Today, I got yelled at all day at work, only to come home and get yelled at by my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 711

You deserved it 179

Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 175

You deserved it 366

Today, at a job interview, I was asked what I thought of twerking. It was a bizarre question, but trying to get on the interviewer's good side, I said I thought it was pretty cool. He snorted and said I'll be job-seeking for a while yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 922

You deserved it 47 171

Today, we found a tarantula type spider in our shed so big it could only have been someone’s escaped pet. This thing was so big, even my husband said, "NOPE!" In the end, we used our neighbour's crossbow to kill, it because I think it grew that big by eating dogs and small horses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 235

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 319

You deserved it 2 564