Life advice
Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML
Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML
Today, at a gynecologist's appointment, I was privileged to have 7 co-ed nursing students stare at my vagina for 25 minutes as part of their training. At one point the doctor apologized for having to "open me up more than usual", but said she wanted everyone to get a good view. FML
Today, my doctor booked me in for an STI test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said, "Gonna be honest Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML
Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML
Today, I was at my gynecologist's for my checkup and had this sudden urge to poop - but it was my turn, so I just went ahead to meet the doc. The doctor noticed that I wanted to poop and also informed all the orderlies that, "This patient wants to pass stool now." FML
Today, I sat next to this really hot guy in my writing class. We struck up a conversation, and it was going well, until he began describing, in excruciating detail, his IBS and fiber problems, and how he always has to poop. Good to know. FML
Today, my professor tried to scare the hiccups out of me. Some pee came out instead. FML
Today, I attended my first surgery as part of my program at med school. I found out that when I see someone's intestines, I vomit. Even if I'm still wearing a surgical mask. There goes the thousands of dollars I spent on college. FML
Today, holding my teenager's hand at the hospital, I unfortunately had a front row seat as a nurse manipulated his penis trying to pop a ball bearing out of his urethra. He had been curious to see if it fit. It did. And no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t pee it out, so off to the hospital we went. FML
Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML
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Top comments
howsthisforaname 34
Having experienced both and seeing how completely unsympathetic my doctors were to pain and discomfort I agree with him.
mba2804 2
Your professor is not exactly wrong.
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Comments (151)
mba2804 2
Your professor is not exactly wrong.
brivielle 15
i agree with him. Lots of injections too
Wingman527 22
What's a catheter and an enema?
Xatraris 38
Google is a thing these days, #37
Wingman527 22
Based on the replies to #2... I don't want to google that.
ruxtain 15
So, does google's existence mean we can't ask a question any more?
neeni88 23
54, Yeah, pretty much. Why should anyone waste their time explaining things when you have the answers right at your fingertips?!
Xatraris 38
I'll answer simple ones. The ones that may be a little long or graphic I'd leave to Google.
Garrison21 11
Haha that's legen.... Wait for it...dairy
schhichick 14
As you wishhhhhh! Oh my sweet Wesley!
schhichick 14
Was it really good Ice cream or cheese? Get it because you said Legend wait for it dairy instead of dary!
gameover18 17
I'll answer you #37 a catheter is when they shove a tube up your penis hole into your bladder to help with draining and an enema is a tube up your butt most often to help clean it up before medical procedure among other stuff.
incoherentrmblr 22
Sounds just as bad as a tester for a rectal thermometer who works at Johnson & Johnson...
cmac86 24
in other words it indeed might change your life. it did mine.
evilscorpi 29
working in a nursing home and seeing all and more at times i do wonder and do say i hope it never happens to me but i cant stop life from going the way it chooses.
snarkytruth 37
OMG I've been catheterized at the hospital and I don't even have a penis. I'm going to sue both the doctor for malpractice and the hospital!
howsthisforaname 34
Having experienced both and seeing how completely unsympathetic my doctors were to pain and discomfort I agree with him.
pwnman 33
#2 didn't get replies. However, his comment was persuasive.
tigerisabelle 31
Yeah, I agree. I think that once you've done it on enough patients, you almost become immune to the pain, because you've seen worse. Not trying to excuse it or anything. One of the most important traits for a doctor is bedside manner.
xxrogerthatxx 19
57, for people who realize the chain of events, your comment is amazing.
LexiDaBae 17
I'm pretty sure an enema would be unconfortable for every man who isn't gay... especially if given by a male doctor.
Kielnmsoftly 26
I've only had a catheter because of major surgery that made it so I wouldn't be able to stand for a few days but that shit sucked. Also many doctors are rude and unsympathetic. I don't give a flying **** that you went to school for a long time. It doesn't make you right when evidence proves you wrong. Sorry bout that last part since it's irrelevant but my old primary doctor knew I had a level 1 heart block that was causing me to pass out and hid it from me for months. I would have died had I not gotten 4 other doctors to look at in before one suggested the surgery I got. 3 surgeries later and I'm doing a lot better but have a problem with my nerves now. :/
traviscool 12
Im probably not the only one, but what is that?
gennyv 29
Enemas are medical exams of the butt and catheters are of the genital area. They feel quite weird
nix1993 41
A catheter is a tube inserted through your urethra to gain access to your bladder, while it's in it basically pees for you.
XxDevilxXGt 26
An enema is a fluid that's put in your butt to clean it out, to put it simply.
LibertyLife20 20
#8: No..just no
Brandi_Faith 34
18 is right about the enemas. Just thought I would add that they are used a lot for constipation as well. You can even give yourself one at home. Catheter's on the other hand are only done by nurses, and are used in a lot of patients for different reasons, but one reason is if they are too sick or ill to get out of bed to pee. The pee goes through the tube and is collected into a bag. I have never had one but catheter's are painful, enema's on the other hand surprisingly aren't.
Xquisite1 28
#8 You really have no idea as to what you are talking about. I bet you think a tampon is a type of vaginal exam also. Idiot.
JKPwnage 27
Google it
dragonkisses28 25
Oh so close #46. While most urinary catheters are inserted by nurses, they may also be inserted by doctors if, say, you have a swollen prostate gland, and a nurse is unable to advance the catheter past the swollen gland. Then the doctor may insert the catheter. So they are not only inserted by nurses. Enemas however...are usually medications ordered by a doctor. Rarely does said doctor hang around to administer the enema personally. This is a task usually left to the nurse.
tournamentdecide 33
No where did 46's comment say that the doctor gives the enemas, just that they can be given by home.
sierrajo09 24
actually enemas can be painful. it all depends on the person and the situation. I do not have a colon and have an internal pouch. enemas kill me.
Brandi_Faith 34
79, I thought of putting nurses and doctors, but left doctors out as they can obviously do it, however they don't usually. I figured common sense would tell them that a doctor could do it. Although common sense isn't always abound on this website so maybe I should've added doctors too.
MLardinos 14
#8 I really hope that was a joke. Scares me to think someone is that stupid.
lochiamochia 25
Urinary catheters are not only inserted by healthcare professionals, but can also be taught to a patient for self-insertion. There exist people who have to self-cath due to urinary retention multiple times a day.
aecribb 14
Yeah, I'm paralyzed from the waist down and have to cath myself multiple times a day because I can't control my bladder. It's not painful for me obviously since I can't feel it, but I can imagine that it would be quite painful if you could. It's a really simple process, at least for males, that's easily learned, but doing it to yourself, provided you had sensation, could help you understand ways to minimize the discomfort involved.
mellyski 25
Catheters are not too painful for females if inserted properly, I can imagine it might be uncomfortable for males though. I had the doctor throw back the hospital curtains while my nurse was inserting one. Most embarrassing moment of my life, legs spread and the rest of the rooms clear view of my vajayjay. Thanks for checking we were done before barging in doc. I'm glad I vomited on you later in the day. Should have posted this as an FML post. Doh!
gennyv 29
According to google, enemas can also be used for x-Ray imaging, but I will admit I was way wrong on the catheter, sorry.
abineya4 7
that sounds... dangerous
tournamentdecide 33
It isn't dangerous, just painful. That's why he thinks that all med students should feel it. Like how a cop has to get tased and pepper sprayed to have the items.
schhichick 14
You know what else is dangerous? Going against a Sicilian when death is on the line
trex454 21
cops aren't required to be tazed but it is an "option" when they are in the academy. legally they can't force anyone to do it.
nellbell414 13
No cops have to be tased to get the job, you are not allowed to carry one around as a cop unless you have experienced it first, it is also part of your training
cmac86 24
if done incorrectly it can be.
LexiDaBae 17
I love how this discussion is completely off topic from the FML.
gennyv 29
Like how cops have to be required to be pepper sprayed so they know how it feels?
Peachy2392 26
They also get tased while in the academy.
Brandi_Faith 34
I don't know about elsewhere, but I know here in Canada getting tased and pepper sprayed is a choice, however most in the academy choose to have it done.
dainy128 7
Technically only one "volunteer" from the class gets tased or pepper sprayed and the rest "observe".
skyeyez9 25
Probably why cops skip the taser and pepper spray, and go straight for their gun.
baseballbv 17
That sounds cruel. I'd ask him if he's gone through that.
SweetasCandy0609 28
#7 I don't think OP'S professor would be telling the class to do it if he didn't know what it felt like himself.
Jinxsie 27
It's not meant to be cruel.
LexiDaBae 17
#36, maybe he would try to make it seem less painful, though it would be an unpleasant surprise in the end.
tygerarmy 35
A lot of professors have said that, several of my friends from different schools have told me the same story.
Brandi_Faith 34
I think these professors are onto something. I'm surprised so many have said it but I agree completely. It will teach students more compassion and bedside manner when having to give them to others.
nix1993 41
I once watched an extremely condescending female doctor tell my brother that he needed to 'grow up a bit' because despite him having a UTI 'catheters do not hurt as much as you're making out'. Even if she had had one, I don't think she could possibly comprehend how much more painful it is for a man. I would be far more willing to listen to her after someone has forced a tube down her infected, irritated and inflamed urethra.
juturnaamo 29
I don't think there's a difference between male and female urethra. They look like they have the same size opening.
Sniperlogics 6
But the male entrance is smaller and longer.
Razi_tail 25
There is a huge difference 68.
askullnamedbilly 33
Also, due to the position of the penis in relation to the bladder, the catheter basically has to be guided around a curve (two, actually, but one can be straightened out by arranging the penis in a horizontal position). I can imagine this could lead to an incredibly painful experience if the catheter is inserted too quickly.
slipstreak 10
What a pain in the ass!
anonymousguy1569_fml_fml 12
Now that could be a pain in the ass...