By an anon - United States - San Francisco Today, some well-meaning soul told me to just pray my depression away, which would be about as effective as praying away a knife in my shin. FML I agree, your life sucks 26941 You deserved it 3797 91 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 5/10/2020 23:01 - United States Thanks for the support! Today, I told my mom that I struggle with depression. She then told me that she thinks that I always seem to suck the life out of a room. FML I agree, your life sucks 1088 You deserved it 206 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom Today, at work, my boss went to the single-stall bathroom on our floor. The next thing I know, I'm on suspension pending review because some asshole left an upper-decker in the toilet. Since I'm the office prankster, all suspicion is now on me. I've been framed by my own colleagues. FML I agree, your life sucks 22816 You deserved it 14807 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By nean83 - United States - Inglewood Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML I agree, your life sucks 24404 You deserved it 39697 113 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 20/7/2020 14:01 Good boy, best boy Today, I realised that I have a better relationship with my cat than I do with my boyfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 1119 You deserved it 378 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sophie - United States Today, my teacher told me I wasn't pretty enough to play the princess part in the play. FML I agree, your life sucks 45689 You deserved it 5741 210 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Bryce - 10/5/2020 02:00 Very fishy Today, my dad and I went fishing. We both got a bite, but when we went to reel it in, both our hooks were in the catfish's mouth. He pushed me in the mud and took my hook out its mouth so he could say he caught it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1522 You deserved it 208 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By systeminitiated - Canada Today, in math class we were learning about gravity. To demonstrate my teacher asked me to stand on the desk and then step off. Upon stepping on the desk it curved inward and cracked. Everyone was dying of laughter. Fuck gravity. FML I agree, your life sucks 74060 You deserved it 9852 190 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By snowbunny - United States Today, I got snowed in. At work. FML I agree, your life sucks 30934 You deserved it 2904 67 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By clayton - Australia - Sydney Today, I was speaking to my mother on the phone, when she mentioned that my dad had surprised her last week with a pearl necklace. Before I could quite grasp what was going on, I'd popped a boner and visualised the scene. What the hell is wrong with me? FML I agree, your life sucks 13454 You deserved it 43951 237 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By noname - Canada Today, I discovered that if I put my ankles on my boyfriends shoulders while we are having sex, I will pee myself. FML I agree, your life sucks 36360 You deserved it 13757 266 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Yudith Today, at work, a customer pulled down her pants and lifted her sweater to reveal a hole in her chest full of greenish, stinky goo. I don't work in anything health-related. FML I agree, your life sucks 2042 You deserved it 109 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Jrex89 - United States - Washington Today, I got woken up and kicked out of bed. Apparently if I cheat in her dreams it still counts. FML I agree, your life sucks 33573 You deserved it 3161 98 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By cchandler - United States Today, I received a phone call from the number of a "single" guy I met online. It was his wife, who is three months pregnant. She threatened to kick my ass. FML I agree, your life sucks 36230 You deserved it 8015 76 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was helping my friend pack her carry on for her vacation. I drove her to the airport, and after her plane took off, I noticed I put my cell phone in her purse. Her vacation is 2 months long. FML I agree, your life sucks 16938 You deserved it 33429 87 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I had to make a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Apparently she thought it would be better to wipe herself with Clorox tough scrub disinfecting wipes than tell me she'd caught an STD. FML I agree, your life sucks 35016 You deserved it 3892 234 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By loveinanelevator Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML I agree, your life sucks 38407 You deserved it 2674 141 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By BrokeButSmart - United States - Valparaiso Today, my boss reprimanded me in front of the rest of the staff for "not following instructions" because I went to a company meeting. I have the email from him telling me to go to the meeting. He thinks I faked it. Unemployment sucks. FML I agree, your life sucks 27936 You deserved it 1708 81 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Los Angeles Today, my boss - whose intelligence level hovers a hair above "Herpity derpity derp" - got up my ass and accused me of lying to him. All because I said that just because I'm a network admin, I can't make his 7 year old piece of crap Blackberry magically be able to use 4G networks. FML I agree, your life sucks 18424 You deserved it 1355 33 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I called my mom while she was out of town and confessed how I have been depressed lately and thinking suicidal thoughts. After my long sob story, she took a breath and said, "OK, just make sure you don't forget to take the dogs out." FML I agree, your life sucks 58602 You deserved it 5667 118 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Australia Today, I took out my ear cartilage piercing. With my comb. FML I agree, your life sucks 32021 You deserved it 10093 104 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By dumped - United States Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML I agree, your life sucks 51693 You deserved it 2769 144 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By toolateabuckshort I agree, your life sucks 3238 You deserved it 1842 54 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Jade - United Kingdom - Wembley Today, after a week of rejoicing that my petty, passive-aggressive, bullying neighbours were moving away, I came home to find the "to let" board had been outside the wrong house the whole time. It's actually the people I really like who are moving away. FML I agree, your life sucks 11914 You deserved it 964 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Miguel Ezpeleta - 29/5/2020 05:00 Never get involved Today, I was working for my cousin. However, two weeks ago I found out my cousin's wife was cheating on him, through lying to her best friend. I told him, and he later told her. They've apparently made up, because I got fired. FML I agree, your life sucks 1386 You deserved it 180 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was reading through a local wedding mag's advice page. A mother-in-law to be was writing about how to handle wanting her son to break off his engagement. I thought, "Wow. That must suck. I'm glad I like my mother-in-law to be." And then I saw her name. FML I agree, your life sucks 74658 You deserved it 3455 149 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By noiguessitsbroken :( - Lithuania - Kaunas Today, I asked my mum why she never had any children after me. She scoffed and asked if I've looked in a mirror lately. FML I agree, your life sucks 50615 You deserved it 4822 90 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By blob - United States - Framingham Today, my mom refused to sign me up for a CPR class, reasoning that if I was ever put in a situation where a person was choking, I could save them using my "common sense" and "intellect". I need the class to graduate. FML I agree, your life sucks 34845 You deserved it 2735 94 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML I agree, your life sucks 34183 You deserved it 7287 237 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By oops - Australia - Newtown Today, I needed to pee at my friend's house. His bathroom door is often left closed even if there's no one in there, so I knocked just to make sure. His stepdad opened the door stark naked. FML I agree, your life sucks 31812 You deserved it 2771 49 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Tj Hunt - United States Today, in the middle of a hot air balloon ride with my girlfriend, I asked her to marry me. She said no. The rest of the ride was the most awkward 2 hours of my life. FML I agree, your life sucks 37626 You deserved it 4435 108 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pretty poly - 10/11/2020 11:01 And today, on Dr Phil… Today, my husband and I got into an argument. He wants to introduce our girlfriend to our kids and make her a part of our everyday family life. When we started this, I was under the impression that it was just a sex thing, and wouldn’t leave our bedroom. He wants to make her his second wife. FML I agree, your life sucks 931 You deserved it 2259 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FML_Fan86 - 23/1/2021 20:02 Moobs are great Today, I finally got a "sexy" pic from my boyfriend. It's of his man boobs. They're bigger than mine. FML I agree, your life sucks 611 You deserved it 156 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By -___- - Canada - Montr?al Today, while out jogging with my mom, we saw my boyfriend walking in our direction. When we reached him, he took one look at my makeup-less face, then made a huge show of screaming in disgust before calmly walking away. FML I agree, your life sucks 50522 You deserved it 5607 127 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ShamefulShoop *cringe intensifies* Today, I took my mother grocery shopping. From the opposite end of the snack aisle, she yelled, "They don't have my darkies! Ya know how I like my darkies!” She was talking about dark pretzels. I don’t think the appalled black couple next to me knew that. FML I agree, your life sucks 3449 You deserved it 264 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By failure461 - United States Today, I ruined my computer screen trying to kill a fly. FML I agree, your life sucks 12544 You deserved it 41819 132 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By brunetteshavemorefun - United Kingdom - Burnley Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML I agree, your life sucks 46827 You deserved it 15093 56 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lolwut - United States - Albany Today, I saw my teacher using her phone in the middle of class, so to joke around with her, seeing as we're on pretty good terms, I said: "Using your phone in class? For shame." She looks me in the eyes and says, "Would it be ok if I told you I'm arranging my father's funeral?" FML I agree, your life sucks 48091 You deserved it 18063 122 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Ames Today, the highlight of my whole month was finally being able to take a solid crap. FML I agree, your life sucks 13377 Phew, glad it wasn't me 1736 31 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By goodbyefriend - United States - Worcester Today, after a few weeks of smuggling a baby caterpillar into work every day just to make sure it ate and stayed alive long enough to turn into a butterfly, it finally did. Before it could fly free, a bird turned it into a snack. FML I agree, your life sucks 29369 You deserved it 5992 175 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, right now, my husband is on the phone with his friend. Last night I had a dream I was cheating on him with this friend. FML I agree, your life sucks 22 You deserved it 37 0 Comments
Today, I know my life is awesome when my partner and I have to plan watching movies and having sex around his drinking schedule. FML I agree, your life sucks 205 You deserved it 53 2 Comments