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By Aaaaahhhhhhhh - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff
Today, I came home to carpenter ants coming out from under my baseboards. I went out and bought bait traps and now there are flying ants coming out of the woodwork. If I try to sleep, they crawl on me. FML
Carpenter ants like to burrow in damp wood. You may have a water leak somewhere.
There's only one solution here, clearly. You must burn down your house. Godspeed.