**** McGee By Anonymous - 21/06/2021 20:01 Today, I was supposed to ask for extra memory allocation for my Linux server, but instead of typing, "Can you increase my memory capacity?", I typed, "Can you increase my mammary capacity?" in a group full of senior engineers. FML I agree, your life sucks 856 You deserved it 302 Share Tweet Share
Today, I couldn't find my key so I sat against the wall to wait for my roommate to get home. I fell asleep. When I woke up a few hours later, I could hear her inside. She chose not to wake me up and let me in. FML I agree, your life sucks 27 469 You deserved it 4 342
Today, I bragged to a coworker that our boss compliments me constantly on my work performance, my fashion sense, and my trustworthiness. She then directed me to a "neighborhood watch" website. My boss is a registered sex offender. FML I agree, your life sucks 57 366 You deserved it 8 236
Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML I agree, your life sucks 738 942 You deserved it 496 031
Today, I went to a job interview and tried to break the ice by making a joke. In doing so, I accidentally insulted the interviewer’s favorite football team. He spent the next 10 minutes explaining why I was wrong. FML I agree, your life sucks 127 You deserved it 520
Today, my girlfriend recently dumped me because she's serious about her career (temp secretary) and needs a man who’s also serious about his career. I’m an area manager for 6 hotels, making almost six figures. I found out she's now dating a very low level weed dealer. Serious career. Sure. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 768 You deserved it 143
Today, I was eating a fancy dinner with my girlfriend at a restaurant. Suddenly, my ex-girlfriend, who was seemingly still angry after our breakup 2 years ago, saw me through the window. She walked in, took my spaghetti dinner, shoved it in my face, and stormed out. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 852 You deserved it 3 487